The Adventures of Thief
by Thief-Chan
Summary: **Chapter fourteen is up*** Chrysa's role
1. Thief's nightmare come true

Adventures of Thief

Thief-Chan: Hello, my name is Thief-Chan. I am the 'authress' of this story. Not the narrator mind you, the author. I can't be held responsible for any people whose computers implode from the randomness in this fan fiction. Now then on to the story!

Disclaimer: I do not own Yu-gi-oh, Final Fantasy, and any other characters in this story I borrowed in order to torture. Although I do like to think I own them.

(In order to protect the innocent they have been given dull names like Ms. Teacher)

(Thief is sitting at a desk blowing bubblegum while staring at the ceiling. She was at a 'meeting' with some person that worked for the government. Thief never found at his name so I'll just call him Mister)

Mister: Hello Thief…

Thief: Hello…

Mister: Do you know why you're here?

Thief: Because you think I'm insane so you're going to throw me in a looney bin. Then I'll escape and we'll see each other again five months later.

Mister: (Pounds his fists on the table so Thief will stop staring at the ceiling.) No! I'm here because you don't go to school.

Thief: Oh, well that's no problem, cause I'm smarter than half the kids my age.

Mister: And how old are you Thief?

Thief: Thirteen.

Mister: Well, you must be a very bright girl then. I'll just get the phone and call your parents…

(The room stays silent for a while)

Thief: I don't have any parents.

Mister: (Voice goes all evil) Well then, the state puts you in my hands. You will live in an apartment. You will pay the weekly rent. You will get a job. And you most certainty will go to school!

(Two days later at the Airport)

Thief: Great, I don't even know where I'm going. Oh well.

(Lifts an overly large suitcase onto a cart)

Thief: Heehee, have fun in the cargo area Macavity!

Macavity: (sweatdrop) You're so cruel.

(Loads Macavity's pet carrier onto the cart and puts on her backpack.)

Thief: See you later!

(Two hours later after take off.)

Thief: Darn plane is so slow! I could've flown faster than this.

(Stares at a headphone set)

Thief: What's this?

(Puts on the headphones and starts flipping through the stations. A flight attendant walks 

by and sees Thief)

Flight Attendant: Ahh! What are you doing! You can't use electronics yet!

(Thief just hums to whatever song she's listening to)

Flight Attendant: Miss!

(Thief opens her eyes and stares at the attendant because she didn't hear a word she said.)

Flight Attendant: Are you listening to me? Take off the headphones!

Thief: (yelling over her headphones) I can't hear you, let me take off the headphones!

(Thief takes off the headphones and puts them away)

Thief: Okay, so what were you saying?

(Attendant walks away mumbling)

Thief: How rude! 

(Half an hour later)

Thief: I'm so bored! There has to be something to do here…

(Pulls out her backpack and takes out a book to read)

Thief: …Why am I reading?!

(Throws the book back in her backpack and falls asleep)

(An hour later)

Flight Attendant: Ma'am?

-Twitch-

Flight Attendant: (shakes Thief a little) Ma'am?

-Twitch-

Flight Attendant: Miss!

Thief: Huh?

Flight Attendant: You wouldn't happen to own a cat would you?

Thief: Uh…yeah why?

Flight Attendant: There's a black cat raiding the first class passengers.

Thief: What?!

(Thief unbuckles her belt and runs to the first class section of the plane. Macavity is going through everyone's food taking all the candy and cookies)

Thief: Macavity!

Macavity: Meow?

(Picks up Macavity and whispers in his ear)

Thief: You filthy cat! You're going to make everyone think I'm nuts owning a cat like you!

Macavity: Well, you're only adding to it by talking to me.

Thief: (sweatdrop) Shut up.

(Another hour later)

Thief: Man I'm hungry. 

(Stops a passing flight attendant)

Thief: Excuse me, don't we get anything to eat?

Flight Attendant: Sorry, the food is for the sane people, but you can have a napkin.

(Thief pulls out AMOD and knocks the flight attendant out)

Thief: I never liked flight attendants…

(Another hour later)

Thief: Man, I'm starving. That stupid cat could've at least split the loot!

(Another hour later)

Thief: How long have I been on this plane?

(Nearly five hours)

Thief: Ack! How can I last another half hour here?

(Half an hour later)

Thief: (sweatdrop)

(Happy?)

Thief: Not really.

(Fine)

(An hour later)

Thief: Stop! Get me off this plane!

(As you wish)

(The plane crashes into some building setting it on fire)

Thief: That's not what I meant! (blows on flaming skirt)

(Picky, picky)

(The plane lands on the ground completely extinguished)

Thief: There.

(Satisfied?)

Thief: For now.

(All Thief's luggage shoots out of the cargo part of the plane knocking her out)

(The next day)

Thief: Where am I?

Macavity: In your apartment. Those people dropped us off.

Thief: What people?

Macavity: The people who own the card shop your going to work at.

Thief: Oh…

Macavity: By the way, it's Monday, a school day.

Thief: Aw, great.

(Thief gets up and looks at her uniform. The shirt is pink and she has to wear a long blue skirt)

Thief: I'm not wearing that.

(Then you'll go back on the plane)

Thief: (puts on her uniform mumbling)

Macavity: Your backpack is on the table.

(Walks to the table and lifts her bag, which weighs about forty pounds)

Thief: What's in here, bricks?

(Worse, school books)

Thief: Ahh!

(Better hurry to school, or you'll be late)

Thief: You wouldn't dare…

(I made the plane crash didn't I?)

(Thief runs out the door and heads for her school. On the way she spots a jewelry shop with a pair of golden earrings in the window.)

Thief: Ooh…pretty.

(Thief enters the shop and lifts the earrings)

Store Owner: Would you like those earrings?

Thief: I don't know…

Store Owner: They're ancient Egyptian earrings.

Thief: I'll take them.

(Pays the owner and runs to her school, just barely making it on time)

Thief-Chan: One chapter down! Please review!


	2. Normal Day: Teacher ditches class, labor...

Thief-Chan: Wow, only one person reviewed my story! Go me! Well, I'm posting the second chapter because…I don't know. I'm only going to post if I get at least two reviews. Come on, just two reviews!  Just two! Yeah, well, on to the story!

Disclaimer: I don't own any Yu-gi-oh, Squaresoft, or other any other Anime characters used in this story.

Thief: Whew…made it.

Teacher: Hello, are you the new student?

Thief: Uh, yeah.

Teacher: Good morning class.

Bored Students: Good morning Miss Teacher.

Teacher: Now everyone please welcome our new student, Thief.

Bored Students: Hello Thief.

Thief: Er…hi…

Teacher: Thief, please take a seat between Bakura and Tea.

(Thief goes to her seat and sits down)

Tea: Hi!Willyoubemyfriend? Idon'thaveanyfriends.Idon'tknowwhyIdon'thaveanyfriends. Doyoulikecookies? Ilovecookies. Cookies for everyone!

(Thief scoots her chair away from Tea)

Teacher: Okay, class settle down. All this week, is a break to get to know your classmates. You'll work in pairs of three. Okay, you may begin.

Thief: Uh…

Bakura: Don't worry you get used to not doing work in here. We never do anything but lounge around. Miss Teacher usually leaves us alone.

(Sure enough, Miss Teacher sneaks out of the room and everyone starts talking.)

Tea: CoOkies!

Thief: Is she always like this?

Bakura: I don't know. We try our best to ignore her.

Thief: Do you have any tape?

Selphie: I do! 

(Selphie hands Thief a roll of tape, which she uses to tape Tea's mouth shut)

Selphie: Why didn't we do that before?

Joey: Beats me.

(Everyone resumes talking again)

Thief: This would be more amusing if I actually knew the people here.

Bakura: Well I'm Bakura. That's Tea, I think. Over there is Selphie, she's always eating candy or playing jump rope or something like that.

(Selphie is shoving a handful of m&m's in her mouth)

Bakura: Over there is Rinoa, she's the bossy one in the class.

(People who want to talk to her surround Rinoa)

Bakura: The two people trading cards over there are Joey and Yugi.

Thief: Cards? What kind?

Bakura: Duel Monsters I suppose.

Thief: I've never heard of Duel Monsters.

Bakura: Here, you can have a few of my old ones.

(Bakura hands Thief a stack of cards)

Thief: Who's that? (Points at someone sitting alone clutching a suitcase)

Bakura: That's Kaiba. He keeps to himself all day.

Thief: Okay…who's that? (Points at two people balancing blitzballs on their noses)

Bakura: That's Wakka and Tidus. They're always playing blitzball.

Thief: Who's that? (Points at someone who's drawing pictures all over the blackboard)

Bakura: That's Relm; she loves to draw.

Thief: And who are they? (Points to some dork trying to impress someone)

Bakura: That would be Tristan and Joey's sister Serenity.

Thief: And who-

Bakura: (Yami Bakura's voice) Look will you stop asking me who's who!

Thief: Huh?

Bakura: Nothing.

(The bell rings and everyone leaves for their science class)

Mr. BoringHead: Good morning, class.

Bored Students: Good Morning, Mr. BoringHead.

Mr. BoringHead: Everyone, please go to your lab groups. Uh, Thief why don't you join Zidane and Tristan?

(Thief walks over to Zidane and Tristan's desk)

Thief: What's our project?

Zidane: I don't know…

Tristan: I think we're supposed to mix something.

Zidane: Tristan! Serenity is watching!

Tristan: She is! Quick help me look smart!

(Tristan and Zidane start mixing a bunch of stuff)

Thief: (slaps hand on head) I don't think you guys should do that…

Zidane: What could go wrong?

(Tristan grabs a bottle of sodium and puts in the water. His sleeve goes over the Bunsen burner and his arm catches on fire. Don't ask how, it just does)

Thief: Tristan…

Tristan: What? Is it getting hot in here, or is it just me?

Zidane: You're arm is on fire!

Tristan: (stares at his arm) Ah! Quick throw some water on it!

(Thief sinks to the floor as Zidane grabs the water they experimented with and throws it at Tristan)

Thief: Zidane! If you put sodium in water the water catches-

(Some of the fire on Tristan's arm goes out, but more fire was added. Yeah, don't ask)

Tristan: Ah!

(Thief runs to the front and grabs the fire extinguisher. She immediately uses it on Tristan who falls on the ground in shock)

Thief: Intelligent enough for you?

Tristan: (nods)

(The bell rang and everyone leaves for math class)

Math Lady: Everyone, please open your book to page four and begin your work. Thief, take a seat next to Terra. 

(Thief sits down between Terra and Locke)

Thief: What chapter are we on?

Locke: One.

Thief: Oh.

(Thief opens her book to begin. The person behind her pokes her back)

Thief: (Turns around) What?!

Joey: How do you do problem one?

Thief: Joey, it's 2+2!

Joey: Oh! (scribbles four down as his answer)

(In case you were wondering, Thief was using the metaphor 2+2 as in it was really easy)

Thief: (Faces front again)

(Joey pokes Thief again)

Joey: What's the answer to number two?

Thief: (sighs) Two plus two.

(I know it's cruel, but it had to be done)

Joey: Gee, thanks Thief! You're like a genius or sumtin'.

Thief: (turns around and works her way until problem twenty)

(Joey pokes Thief again)

Thief: Yes…

Joey: How do you do problem three?

Thief: They're all two plus two okay!

Joey: Really? I thought Algebra was hard, but these problems are easy!

(Thief turns around again and finishes her assignment)

Terra: You're done already?

Thief: Yes.

Terra: But, only seven minutes went by.

Thief: Well, Joey took seven minutes to do four problems…

Terra: Good point.

(Thief gets bored so she falls asleep)

_Thief._

Huh? Who are you?

_Thief, it's me Z, the voice in your head._

Z, I've told you a million times, I'm not schizophrenic. 

_(Ignores Thief) The earrings you have are more important than you think they are._

Hey wait a minute! You're not Z! 

(Pauses) Well maybe I could talk in a normal voice, if the teacher wasn't yelling at Tifa right now!

Huh?

(Thief wakes up and sees Tifa listening to headphones)

Tifa: (hums some crappy pop song)

Math Lady: (clears throat)

(Tifa looks up and takes off her head phones)

Tifa: That was rude! You interrupted my favorite song!

Math Lady: Detention Tifa.

(Tifa starts pouting as the bell rings. Everyone leaves for lunch)

Thief: That was short I thought school was supposed to be hard. Hmm…but who will I sit with…

(Spots Yugi and Bakura)

Thief: Better than nothing.

(Thief walks over to Yugi and Bakura and starts eating)

Yugi: Hello, Thief. 

Thief: Hello, Yugi.

Bakura: Hello.

Thief: Hi.

(Stays silent until Yugi pulls out three new packs of Duel Monsters)

Bakura: You're grandfather gave you new packs?

Yugi: He said to give them to three friends, so here.

(Yugi hands one to Bakura one to Thief and keeps one for himself, since he only has two friends in this weird dimension)

Thief: I can have this?

Yugi: Yeah!

(Yugi opens his and gets lame cards)

Yugi: Not again. Oh well, I guess I can sell them to Joey.

(Bakura opens his and gets too many cutesy cards)

Bakura: This looks like Tea put it together.

(Thief sticks her hand in her backpack to find scissors, but pulls her earring out instead)

Thief: I forgot I had these!  
(Thief puts on one earring and uses the other to open her pack. The pack glows for a while and then fades out)

Bakura: What cards did you get?

Thief: I've never heard of these, but then again, I'm not big on Duel Monsters. (Hands the cards to Yugi) Are they any good?

Yugi: I've never heard of these either!

Bakura: What cards are they?

Yugi: The White Summoner Sphinx, the Pure Golden Dragon, Yin, Yang, Tears of Destiny! These are some pretty good cards too!

(Yugi hands the cards back to Thief. Thief examines the cards)

Thief: (Looks her cards over) These cards look cool.

(Thief puts her cards away and puts her other earring on)

Bakura: Those are some odd looking earrings…

Yugi: Yeah.

(The earrings have a chain that twists in different directions. At the end of each is a black ball with a white center)

Thief: The guy I bought them from said they were Egyptian. 

Yugi: I have an Egyptian artifact too, and so does Bakura.

(Yugi shows Thief his puzzle, and Bakura pulls his ring out from his backpack)

Thief: Is that in a cage?

Bakura: Don't ask, it's a rather long story.

(Thief continues eating and brushes back her hair touching her earrings. After that everything blacked out)

Thief: Are you out to get me, or something?!

(Look, I'm just the narrator. I didn't write this story!)

Thief: Oh.

(Thief wakes up in a strange room)

Thief-Chan: Well that's all for chapter two! Hmm…don't be mad at me if some of the characters are weird. It's not my fault um…it's your fault! Yeah, that sounds about right. Oh yeah, and I made those cards up myself so you can blame me for that. How she got them will be explained later.  Now review!


	3. School day two and the Blue Eyes White D...

Thief-Chan: For the person who actually reads this, I am sorry that I'm late in updating this pathetic story of mine. I'm even more sorry that you are actually reading this stupid update of mine. 

Disclaimer: I don't own any characters, except for Thief, that exist in this story.

(Thief wakes up in a strange room)

Thief: Where am I?

Mr. Moto: Good you're awake.

Thief: Where am I?

Yugi: You're in Grandpa's card shop.

Thief: Oh, is it time for work already?

Yugi: (Sweatdrop)

Thief: What, am I late or something?

Mr. Moto: You feinted at school.

Thief: Oh, well I'm fine. I'll just get working.

Yugi: You're the one who is going to work here?

Thief: Yes.

Mr. Moto: Why do you need a job?

Thief: So I can pay the rent at my apartment.

Mr. Moto: Don't your parents pay the rent?

Thief: I don't have any parents.

Mr. Moto: Well I won't allow a child to live alone. Why don't you stay here with us? You can sleep in the guest room if you work on the weekends.

Thief: Sure! Just let me get my stuff.

(Thief walks outside, snaps her fingers and all her stuff appears. She gathers it all together and walks back in)

Thief: Okay, I'm back!

Macavity: Meow…

Mr. Moto: You…you have a cat?!

Thief: Is that a problem?

(Mr. Moto sneezing and Macavity hisses)

Yugi: Grandpa is allergic to cats.

Thief: Macavity, that means you'll have to stay outside.

(Macavity leaves grumbling about dogs)

Thief: Stupid cat…

Mr. Moto: I'd better go to the pharmacy and pick up some allergy medicine. Yugi show Thief around the shop.

(Mr. Moto leaves)

(Ten minutes later)

Yugi: I think that's everything. We'd better get to work. I'll sort the packs and you run the cash register.

Thief: Okay, that sounds simple.

(Thief walks over to the counter and sits down)

(Five minutes later)

Thief: _Sheesh, nobody is coming.  don't think it would hurt to buy a pack of my own._

(Thief opens the register and insert some money. After that she opens two packs of cards)

Thief: Wow! These cards are great!

(Yugi stops setting the shelves and walks to the counter)

Yugi: What cards did you get?

(Thief shows Yugi her cards)

Yugi: Wow! I haven't heard of these trap cards. 

Thief: (shrugs) Maybe they're new cards nobody has heard of.

Yugi: Maybe…

 (Mr. Moto walks back in)

Mr. Moto: I can handle things from here you two. Yugi, show Thief to her room.

(Yugi and Thief go upstairs. Thief enters her room and Yugi goes to his)

Thief 

Thief: Who's there?

Thief, touch your earring

Thief: Why?

Don't ask why! Just do it!

(Thief touches her earrings and is warped into some white room. An Egyptian looking guy is standing before her dressed in a cloak to cover half his face)

Thief: Who are you?

Guy: I'm not from your world, but you may call me Yami.

Thief: Yami? That's a weird name. Is it French?

Yami: (face fault) No it's not French!

Thief: Why are you here anyway?

Yami: I'm here to tell you about your millennium item.

Thief: My what?

Yami: Your earrings!

Thief: Oh.

Yami: The reason why no one has ever seen your cards is because I made them. I was the pharaoh of my Egypt. I made the millennium items of my Egypt. Your earrings can awake the sleeping monsters whenever you come in contact with Duel Monster cards.

Thief: Oh! That explains it. An ancient Egyptian pharaoh is controlling my cards!

Yami: (ignores Thief) That's not all your item can do.

Thief: Whatever…

Yami: Don't you want to know? 

Thief: I'd prefer to find out for myself.

Yami: Trust me, you don't want to learn of this power on your own. It would be quite strange to see it happen before your eyes.

(Thief leaves the white room and is in her room again)

Thief: That was strange…

(Macavity climbs through the window)

Macavity: I refuse to stay outside! 

Thief: Too bad! (Pushes Macavity out the window)

(The next day)

Mr. Moto: Get up! You two will be late for school!

(Thief wakes up, puts on her horrible uniform, grabs her backpack, and walks to school)

Thief: I don't want to go to school.

(Too bad, you're already there)

Thief: Great.

(Thief walks in her classroom and takes her seat. Tea still has tape over her mouth and is now, also, taped to her chair)

Miss Teacher: You know your assignment,

(Everyone starts talking)

Thief: I think I'll go talk to some people…

(Thief walks over to a small kid with a shadowy face and huge orange eyes)

Thief: Hello, I'm Thief.

Kid: My name is Vivi.

Thief: Are you a black mage?

Vivi: (nods)

Thief: Cool! I've never met a black mage before!

(Thief starts babbling on as Vivi scoots away)

Thief: Well that was mean. Oh well, there are plenty of people here.

(Thief walks over to Tristan. Tristan is competing with some other dork for Serenity.

Tristan: Look, I'm Joey's friend!

Edgar: But I'm better  than you are!

Tristan: I got cool hair and my own coat!

Edgar: I starred in my own video game!

Serenity: (sweatdrop)

(Thief walks away and sits back in her seat)

Thief: This whole room is filled with nutcases!

Selphie: You get used to it after a while.

Thief: Well I'm not used to crazy people.

(Yes you are)

Thief: Am not.

(Are too)

Thief: Am not!

Bakura: (To Selphie) Who is she talking to?

Selphie: I have no clue. (Eats some candy)

Thief: Am not!

(Are too!)

Thief: AM NOT!

(The bell rings and everyone leaves for science)

Mr. BoringHead: I'm sorry, science class has been cancelled due to fire hazards.

Class: Woo-hoo!

(Everyone leaves for Math)

Math Lady: Pop Quiz!

Thief: Yay!

(Everyone stares at Thief)

Thief: I mean, boo!

(The teacher passes out the quiz papers)

Locke: Thief, how do you do problem twelve?

Thief: You're on number twelve?

Locke: No, I just wanted to know the answer.

(Thief goes back to her work)

(An hour later the bell rings and everyone heads out for lunch)

Thief: That was such an easy quiz!

(Thief walks over to eat with Yugi and Bakura)

Thief: Hey!

Bakura: Hello.

Yugi: Hi!

Thief: I had the strangest dream last night, this Egyptian guy claimed to be my Yami and said that these earrings have special powers. Weird isn't it.

(Silence)

(Thief: Oh, shut up

Yugi: Maybe he was your Yami.

Bakura: Yes, Yugi and me have a Yami, but I prefer to keep mine in his cage.

Thief: Oh. (Takes off her earrings) Maybe it wasn't a dream…

Yugi: Hey can I see one?

Thief: Why?

Yugi: I want to see if it's possible to contact my Yami through a different item.

Bakura: Yes, let me see one too. I'd like to see if I can get a new Yami.

(Thief hands Yugi and Bakura one earring each)

Yugi: How come this item isn't gold?

Bakura: And it doesn't have the same markings.

(Yugi puts one earring on and Bakura puts one on. Both of them start glowing bright blue for  a while before they took the earrings off)

Yugi: (In Bakura's voice) That was quite odd…

Bakura: (In Yugi's voice) Hey! How am I standing in front of myself!

Yugi: (In Bakura's voice) Great scott! We must have switched minds!

Thief: (sweatdrop)

Bakura: (In Yugi's voice) Great, why must this happen at school?

Yugi: (In Bakura's voice) Maybe nobody will notice.

(Yuffie runs up to Bakura)

Yuffie: Bakura did you finish our social studies project?

Yugi: (In Bakura's voice) Yes I finished.

Yuffie: (looks confused) Yugi, how come you sound like Bakura?

Yugi/Bakura: Uh….

Yuffie: Never mind

(Yuffie leaves as the bell rings)

Thief: Well, I'll see you guys later!

(Thief runs to the P.E. area)

Mr. Sephy: Today we will play dodge zone. First I'll pick a target and give a demonstration. 

(Thief stares at Mr. Sephy with big eyes)

Thief: Sephy I'm your biggest fan! You are the best Final Fantasy villain in the whole entire world! (glomps Mr. Sephy)

Mr. Sephy: (scowls at Thief) I believe I've found our target.

Thief: Huh?

(Mr. Sephy pushes Thief into a chalk drawn circle)

Mr. Sephy: Fire!

(Everyone throws dodge balls at Thief)

Aeris: Stop! That isn't fair,; let Thief go!

(Mr. Sephy throws a dodge ball at Aeris)

(This goes on for an hour. Everyone leaves for social studies)

Thief: Ouch my arm hurts.

Bakura: (In Yugi's voice) At least you're not Aeris.

Yugi: (In Bakura's voice) Is she still in the nurse's office?

Thief: Yes.

Mr. Study: Good morning class.

Bored Students: Good morning Mr. Study.

Thief: Why are they saying good morning? It's after noon!

Mr. Study: (ignores Thief) Today we're going to learn about the discovery of America.

(He talks for nearly the whole period)

Yuffie: ZzZzZzZzZzZz…

Mr. Study: Ahem!

Yuffie: Huh?

Mr. Study: Yuffie, please tell the class who discovered America.

Yuffie: Umm…Christopher Pilgrim Polo?

(Everyone laughs as the bell rings)

Mr. Study: Detention Ms. Yuffie.

Yuffie: Darvit.

Mr. Study: Double detention for bad language!

(Everyone leaves for their elective)

Thief: What class is this anyway?

Bakura: (In Yugi's voice) Broadcasting, but we can't do anything until the system is up.

Thief: (Sits back in her chair) Well I'm bored! 

Yugi: (In Bakura's voice) Why don't you ask your Yami how to get us in our right bodies?

Thief: (sweatdrop) Okay.

(Thief touches her earrings and is back with her Yami again)

Thief: Yami?

Yami Thief: What?

Thief: How do you switch back?

Yami Thief: What do you mean?

Thief: Yugi and Bakura switched minds.

Yami Thief: (smirks) I was wondering when that would happen.

Thief: Can you just tell me how to fix it!

Yami Thief: Fine! All you have to do is put the earrings back on.

Thief: That's it?

Yami Thief: That and duel someone.

Thief: Why do I have to duel someone?

Yami Thief: Because I'm bored

(Thief wakes up back in class again)

Thief: (hands Yugi and Bakura the earrings) Here, put them on.

(Yugi and Bakura put the earrings on, glow for a second, and return to their original state)

Yugi: Good, I'm back!

Bakura: Glad that's over with.

Thief: (takes the earrings back) Okay, now what?

Bakura: I don't know.

Yugi: Why don't you look at your cards?

Thief: Okay. (pulls out her cards)

Bakura: I still don't understand why we've never heard of these

(Tea, still taped to the chair, hops over to them)

Tea: Mi funnah do!

Yugi: What?

Tea: Mi funnah do!

Bakura: Huh?

Tea: MI FUNNAH DO!

Thief: (rips the tape off Tea's mouth)

Tea: I wanna duel!

(The bell rings and everyone starts leaving)

Thief: Sorry, got to go!

(Later at the card shop…)

Selphie: Let me buy one more pack!

Yugi: I already explained it to you. There are only four Blue Eyes White Dragons. My grandpa owns one, and Kaiba owns the other three. There isn't a single way you can get a Blue Eyes by opening a pack of cards.

Selphie: I'll buy two…

Thief: Sold! (takes the money for the register and hands Selphie a pack of cards)

Yugi: Duel monsters is sure getting more popular.

Selphie: I got it!

Thief/Yugi: (Stare at Selphie with wide eyes)

Selphie: If I buy two more I'll get the Blue Eyes!

Thief/Yugi: (Face fault)

Selphie: What?

Thief: Never mind… (Takes Selphie's money again)

(Selphie rips it open and looks disappointed when she doesn't see a Blue Eyes)

Selphie: Darvit!

Thief: You're not going to find it! You've gone through nearly every pack of cards we have! 

Yugi: Grandpa's going to need a new shipment soon…

Selphie: I suppose you think you could find a better card than the Blue Eyes?

Yugi: There aren't many cards better than the Blue Eyes Selphie…

Thief: (Eyes glint) As a matter of fact, I think I could find a better card.

(Thief walks to a shelf and pulls out two packs)

Thief: I bet I could beat any duelist with the cards in these two packs.

Selphie: Prove it!

(Thief slips her money in the register and opens the packs of cards with her earring. Here are the cards she got: Exodia Right Arm, Exodia Left arm, Exodia, Exodia's left leg, Exodia's right leg, Dark Magician, Monster Reborn, Polymerization, Gift of the Mystical Elf, Mystical Elf, Time Scroll, Heaven's Scroll, Caged Wing, Summoner's Flute, Summoner's Staff, Silver Phoenix, Death Draft, and Blue Eyes White Dragon. Don't ask what they are; some were obviously created by me since they sound so crappy.)

Yugi: How did you get those?!

Selphie: (Falls to the ground) No fair! You get all the luck!

Yugi: I don't even know what some of those cards do.

Thief: Cool! I got all the Exodia pieces!

Yugi: It took my Grandpa forever to get all five!

Selphie: (Is crying all loud) It's not fair! How can you find all of those in a two packs of cards!

Yugi: What are these? 

Thief: I think I'm going to like this deck.

Selphie: I'm out of here! (Picks up a huge crate of cards and leaves)

Yugi: That was odd…

Thief: Hey, I'll duel you!

Yugi: Uh…no thanks…

Thief: Aw…

(Later when Thief goes to her room)

Thief: I can't believe how many cards I have now. 

Yami Thief: You should thank me; I made those cards.

Thief: Well yeah, but I paid for them!

Yami Thief: (Sweatdrop)

Thief: I think I like my White Sumoner Sphinx the best.

Yami Thief: When used right that card can be unstoppable.

Thief: Cool. I think I'll buy some more cards before going tomorrow.

Yami Thief: Why?

Thief: I want to duel someone. Anyone! As long as I get to test out these cards.

Yami Thief: Tomorrow is a school day.

Thief: They gave us the day off.

Yami Thief: Why?

Thief: Because they fired our P.E. teacher so he set the gym on fire. 

Yami Thief: Okay…

(Macavity scratches the window)

Macavity: Let me in!

Thief: No!

Thief-Chan: Well, that's it! Please review!


	4. Dueling Selphie and evil Narrators

Thief-Chan: After such a looong time, I've finally updated. And, hoorah for me, MT isn't my only review! Yay, go me!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own any characters in this story except the characters I own.  
  
(The next day)  
  
Macavity: Are you awake yet?  
  
Thief: I'm up already! Sheesh…  
  
Macavity: Where are you going today?  
  
(Thief gets up and puts her cards in a bag)  
  
Thief: I'm going to find someone to duel.  
  
Macavity: Why don't you just duel Yugi?  
  
Thief: Yugi won't duel me!  
  
(Thief walks downstairs and pays for two more packs of cards)  
  
Yugi: Who are you going to duel?  
  
Thief: I don't know yet. I think I'll just take a taxi over to the dueling arena.  
  
Yugi: Cool, I'll come.  
  
(Thief and Yugi take a taxi over to the dueling arena. Thief looks around and spots Selphie)  
  
Selphie: Thief I challenge you to a duel!  
  
Thief: Why me?  
  
Selphie: It's not fair that you get a Blue Eyes and I don't!  
  
Thief: Are you sure you want to duel?  
  
Selphie: Yes!  
  
Thief: Okay then.  
  
Selphie/Thief: Let's duel!  
  
(Life points: 8000-8000)  
  
(Selphie and Thief draw five cards each)  
  
Selphie: (Places a magic card on the field along with one monster in defense mode) I place one magic card one the field. I also place this monster face down in defense mode! Whee!  
  
Thief: (Places Elven mage on the field in attack mode) I place my Elven mage on the field in attack mode! Elven mage attack!  
  
Selphie: (laughs)  
  
Thief: What's so funny?  
  
Selphie: You've destroyed my Cyber Jar! Which destroys all monsters on the field! Now we both have to draw five more cards.  
  
(No life points are lost)  
  
(Thief and Selphie both draw)  
  
Selphie: (Places one magic card on the field and one defense monster) Your turn.  
  
Thief: What fun. (Places one monster in defense mode and one magic card)  
  
Selphie: I place Gearfied The Iron Knight in attack mode!   
  
(Gearfied tries to attack, but is destroyed)  
  
Selphie: Huh?  
  
Thief: You attacked my Silver Phoenix! Which has a defense of 2000!  
  
(8000-7800)  
  
Thief: My draw.  
  
(Thief draws a card and places one magic card on the field)  
  
Selphie: (Places a card in defense mode and one magic card) Darn useless cards…  
  
Thief: I play Mystical Elf in defense mode! (Mystical Elf starts chanting)  
  
Selphie: (draws and places a card in attack mode) This card isn't entirely useless. Spikebot attack Mystical Elf!  
  
Thief: Not so fast! Mystical Elf has better defense than Spikebot's attack!  
  
(Spikebot is destroyed 8000-7600)  
  
Thief: (draws) I place one magic card on the field. (Places cards on the field) Along with one monster in defense mode.  
  
Selphie: (Draws) These cards are horrible! (Places one defense monster and one trap card)  
  
Thief: (Draws and turns one of her cards over) Attack Black Summoner Sphinx!  
  
(Thousand eyes idol is destroyed)  
  
Thief: (sweatdrop)  
  
Selphie: (Draws) I just drew a great card! Sword Hunter!  
  
Thief: Not so fast! (Turns over Angel's Tears)   
  
Selphie: Angel's Tears? What does that do?  
  
Thief: Angel's Tears is a trap card. The angel's tears cry for the lost of their elf. So they take your monster instead!  
  
(Selphie starts pouting as Thief draws)  
  
Thief: I place one magic card on the field and end my turn.  
  
(Mystical Elf keeps chanting)  
  
Selphie: (laughs) I place Goblin Attack Force! Attack!  
  
(Goblins try to attack but turn into roses)  
  
Thief: Making more mistakes are you? (Turns over another trap card) Rose petals! Rose petals turn all of your monsters into roses! Cutting their attack powers in half! Attack Black Summoner Sphinx!  
  
(Goblin Attack Force is destroyed. 8000-6650)  
  
Thief: My turn! (Draws) I won't do anything for this turn.  
  
Selphie: I play Deep Sea Warrior along with Umy and Stop Defense! Your elf is history!  
  
(Mystical Elf disappears 6900-6650)  
  
Thief: I activate Time Scroll! To bring back my Mystical Elf unharmed from any damage! Mystical Elf goes back in defense mode and I use Black Summoner Sphinx to destroy your wimpy warrior.   
  
(6900-6450)  
  
Thief: What's wrong Selphie, you were so happy.  
  
Selphie: (Draws) I play Legendary Fisherman in defense mode.  
  
Thief: This so cool! I play one magic card on the field and attack Legendary Fisherman with my dragon.  
  
Selphie: (Draws) This is a pretty good card. Oh, and I play this in defense mode.  
  
Thief: (draws)  
  
Selphie: (Mumbles something about Baby Dragon) I play Baby Dragon and Time Wizard. Making the Thousand Dragon!  
  
Thief: I play no cards this turn.  
  
Selphie: (draws a card) Attack Pure Gold Dragon!  
  
Thief: (coughs)  
  
Selphie: What?  
  
Thief: (Points to Pure Gold Dragons stats: 2600-2200)  
  
Selphie: I…impossible…  
  
Thief: My turn! (Pulls another card) Pure Gold Dragon attack the Thousand Dragon!  
  
Selphie: Just as I thought you'd do! Mirror force!  
  
Thief: Darvit!  
  
(Pure Gold Dragon disappears)  
  
Selphie: I play grave robber! To revive your Pure Gold Dragon! Both my dragons attack Thief!  
  
Thief: Say bye-bye to your Pure Gold Dragon! (Turns over Caged Wing) Caged Wing traps all dragons you play on the field!  
  
(Pure Gold Dragon and Thousand Dragon become trapped in a cage)  
  
Yugi: Did I miss anything?  
  
Thief: Shh! (draws) I play this card face down.  
  
Selphie: This card in defense mode.  
  
Thief: I play White Summoner Sphinx in attack mode! (Turns over a magic card) And using her Summoner's Flute she puts both dragons on her side.  
  
Yugi: Wow, good move!  
  
Selphie: Great, and me with my crappy defenses…  
  
(Draws)  
  
Selphie: Just Desserts! You lose 500 life points for every monster on the field.  
  
Thief: I turn over Ancient Wisdom!  
  
Selphie: What does that do?  
  
Yugi: When one player activates a trap, a spell caster can use Ancient Wisdom to stop the trap and take away 200 life points.  
  
Thief: How did you know that?  
  
Yugi: I borrowed your cards yesterday.  
  
Thief: (Sweatdrop) And I use my Dark Magician to use Ancient Wisdom!  
  
(Turns over Dark Magician)  
  
Thief: (Draws) I play Yin in attack mode!  
  
(Attacks Bite shoes and White Summoner Sphinx goes to attack mode)  
  
Selphie: I place one card on the field.  
  
Thief: I play another dragon on the field! The Red Eyes Black Dragon! I also put the Summoner Sphinx back in attack mode.  
  
Selphie: I play Shadow Ghoul!   
  
Yugi: That means Shadow Ghoul gains points for all the monsters that have died!  
  
Thief: Nope! I activate Death Draft!   
  
Selphie: What does that do?  
  
Yugi: Death Draft automatically kills any monster on the field.  
  
Thief: Namely your Shadow Ghoul!  
  
(Shadow Ghoul dies)   
  
Thief: Okay it's my turn now. (Draws) I play the mighty Blue Eyes White Dragon!   
  
Selphie: (Plays one card face down and plays one monster in defense mode)  
  
Thief: I play Monster Reborn! To reborn Shadow Ghoul!  
  
Selphie: It only gains one bonus.  
  
Thief: (Sweatdrop) Oh yeah. (Withdraws the Shadow Ghoul)  
  
Selphie: (Draws) Dark Magician destroy her Red Eyes!  
  
(Red Eyes dies)  
  
(6800-6250)  
  
Thief: (Draws) This ends here! I use the Summoning Flute to get one monster from my deck. Guess which card I choose?  
  
Selphie: What?  
  
Thief: The unstoppable Exodia!  
  
Selphie: No!  
  
Thief/Yami Thief: Exodia, OBLITERATE!  
  
(6800-0)  
  
(Selphie sinks to the floor)   
  
Selphie: How could I loose?  
  
Thief: Cause you suck?  
  
Selphie: Hmmph!  
  
(Selphie leaves as Thief puts her cards away)  
  
Yugi: Wow Thief, you beat Selphie and that was your first time playing Duel Monsters!  
  
Thief: Well, it wasn't that hard. Selphie didn't put a good strategy together.  
  
Yugi: Are you going to duel someone else?  
  
Thief: Nah, I think I'll just go  
  
Yugi: Okay, I'll see you later!  
  
(Thief leaves the arena and walks into an ice-cream parlor)  
  
Person: Hey! I ordered a vanilla milk shake! Not chocolate!  
  
Thief: Fairy?  
  
TSF: Thief!  
  
(TSF=The Shoe Fairy)  
  
Thief: What are you doing here?  
  
TSF: Some guy named Mister sent me here.   
  
Thief: That's what happened to me. He said I had to go to school.  
  
TSF: I don't need to go to school; he just thinks I'm crazy.  
  
(Someone passes by TSF)  
  
TSF: Hey you! I'll buy your shoe off of you!  
  
Person: Freak…  
  
(The person leaves the shop)  
  
TSF: Well that was rude. No one sells shoes anymore. I guess they don't like soda.  
  
Thief: Why don't you make a soda machine? Then they could insert their shoes in it for the sodas.  
  
TSF: That's a great idea! But I'll need someone to make it.  
  
Thief: Already done. There're tons of kids at school who are good at building things.  
  
TSF: Like who?  
  
Thief: Rikku!  
  
(TSF and Thief leave the ice cream shop, apparently they both forgot they entered to get ice cream, and headed for Rikku's house.)  
  
Thief: Here it is!  
  
(Thief walks up to the house and rings the doorbell)  
  
Rikku: Yes?  
  
Thief: Hi Rikku!  
  
Rikku: Hello Thief, need me to fix something?  
  
Thief: No, I need you to build me a soda machine.  
  
TSF: One that only accepts shoes. Left shoes are preferred.  
  
Rikku: (Stares at them confused) Okay…  
  
TSF: And I need it really soon.  
  
Rikku: Sure, come by later.  
  
Thief: Great!   
  
(Rikku closes the door. Thief and TSF walk away)  
  
TSF: What do we do now?  
  
Thief: I don't know. We're in an alternate dimension. All video game characters and Anime characters seem to have been chibi-fied….  
  
TSF: And I'm running low on shoes.  
  
Thief: Uh…yeah that too.  
  
TSF: Where's Macavity?  
  
Thief: Last time I checked he was in my room.  
  
TSF: Where are you living?  
  
Thief: In the Moto house. I sleep in the guest room.  
  
TSF: You live with Yugi?!  
  
Thief: (Rolls eyes) Yes Fairy…  
  
TSF: That is so cool!  
  
(TSF blabs on about how cool Yugi is as Thief sneaks away)  
  
Thief: Glad I'm away from that…  
  
(It was then that Thief noticed she was lost)  
  
Thief: Huh? I am not lost! I know exactly where I am!  
  
(Then where are you?)  
  
Thief: Um…  
  
(See, you're lost)  
  
Thief: Fine! I'll ask Fairy where I am!  
  
(Her name isn't Fairy)  
  
Thief: (sighs) Fine! I'll ask TSF where I am!  
  
(Thief turns around to talk to TSF, but she is gone)  
  
Thief: Where did she go!  
  
(In the gap of another plot twist)  
  
Thief: You'd think I'd be used to plot twists by now.  
  
(Well, you think you'd listen to the narrator now don't you?)  
  
Thief: Oh shut up…  
  
(Thief walks over to a random person)  
  
Thief: Can you tell me where I am?  
  
Random Person: Plot Twist City.  
  
Thief: What?!  
  
Random Person: Plot Twist City:  
  
Thief: I heard you the first time.  
  
Random Person: Then why'd you ask me a second time?  
  
Thief: Ah!  
  
(Creative name isn't it?)  
  
Thief: No.  
  
(You should never contradict with a narrator)  
  
Thief: (Sticks tongue out) Well I just did!  
  
(Thief starts walking until she is run over by fan girls)  
  
Fan Girls: (Shout random things)  
  
Thief: (Stands up and brushes her shirt) Ouch…Who's fan girls are those anyway? (Trunks)  
  
Thief: No wonder there were so many!  
  
(Thief starts to walk again)  
  
Thief: Why don't I just use my staff to transport myself home?  
  
(You left your staff at home)  
  
Thief: Oh…  
  
(Thief continues walking)  
  
Thief: Why don't I turn into my Esper form and fly home?  
  
(Because too many people could see you)  
  
Thief: Good point…  
  
(Thief continues walking)  
  
Thief: Why can't I just call for Echo to come?  
  
(Because that's not how things work in Plot Twist City)  
  
Thief: (mumbles) Jerk…  
  
(I heard that)  
  
Thief: So?  
  
(Thief continues walking)  
  
Thief: Can't I stop? I'm tired!  
  
(Thief bumps into someone with long black hair)  
  
Person: Watch where you're going!  
  
(Thief gets knocked to the ground and stares up at the person)  
  
Thief: Sorry…  
  
Person: Hmmph…  
  
(She reaches out her hand and helps Thief up)  
  
Person: Who are you anyway?  
  
Thief: My name is Thief.  
  
Person: My name is Ukira. You're a Sumoner aren't you?  
  
Thief: How did you know that?  
  
Ukira: I'm a psychic Black Mage.  
  
Thief: You're a Black Mage?! You look more…human than most Black Mages…  
  
Ukira: Yeah, well you're pretty clumsy for a Sumoner.  
  
Thief: (Sweatdrop)  
  
Ukira: Where do you live?  
  
Thief: I don't remember. I live with Yugi, that's all I know.  
  
Ukira: I know where that is, just come with me.  
  
(Ukira whistles and a taxi stops. Ukira tells the taxi where to go, Thief couldn't here over the engine, and in no time they were in front of the card shop)  
  
Thief: That was fast.  
  
Ukira: Well, I told him to hurry.  
  
Thief: Okay…what do I owe you?  
  
Ukira: Huh?  
  
Thief: You paid the cab, I should at least pay you bak.  
  
Ukira: Keep your money. I was coming here anyway.  
  
Thief: Why were you coming here?  
  
Ukira: Some guy named Mister is making me go to school here.  
  
Thief: Oh.  
  
Ukira: See ya!  
  
(Meanwhile…)  
  
Rikku: Hey!  
  
TSF: Huh?  
  
Rikku: I finished your soda machine.  
  
TSF: COOL!  
  
(Rikku gives TSF the soda machine)  
  
Rikku: That'll be two hundred dollars please.  
  
(TSF hands Rikku a shoe and disappears)  
  
Rikku: Hey!  
  
(Meanwhile…)  
  
Ukira: Thief is weird. I wonder why I was sent to find her. She doesn't seem like someone who might possess a great power. She just seems like some clumsy Sumoner. Oh well, if I was sent here to dispose of her power then I will do just that. But I'm going to need some help in doing so.  
  
(Meanwhile…)  
  
Macavity: So you beat Selphie, found TSF, and then ran into a Black Mage?  
  
Thief: That's what happened.  
  
Macavity: Just like at home.  
  
(Macavity jumps off Thief's bed and runs out of the room)  
  
Thief: (Sweatdrop) Okay….  
  
(Thief leaves her room and goes back into the card shop)  
  
Yugi: Hey Thief!  
  
Thief: Hi, Yugi.  
  
Bakura: Hello, Thief.  
  
Thief: BAKURA!  
  
(Silence…)  
  
Thief: What?  
  
Yugi: (Sweatdrop) Never mind…  
  
Thief: Okay…  
  
(More silence)  
  
Thief: So, what now?  
  
Yugi: Uh…  
  
Bakura: I think I'll go now…  
  
(Bakura leaves and Yugi goes upstairs)  
  
Thief: Whatever…  
  
(You're all alone now Thief)  
  
Thief: (grumbles)  
  
(Don't grumble)  
  
Thief: And why not?!  
  
(There sure were a lot of Trunks fan girls, how about they team up with Lego's?)  
  
Thief: No! Anything but that!  
  
(Then do what I say)  
  
Thief: Okay, what?  
  
(Five minutes later…)  
  
Macavity: More catnip!  
  
Thief: (sweatdrop) How much did you bribe the narrator?  
  
Macavity: Two hundred dollars, why?  
  
Thief: (Face fault)  
  
Thief-Chan: Well, that's the story. Now to clear something up-Yeah, that duel stunk, what are you going to do about? 


	5. A trip to the peanut factory

Thief-Chan: Heehee, this was a very interesting chapter...  
  
Disclaimer: Uh yeah...  
  
Yugi: Thief, are you awake yet?  
  
(Thief opens her eyes to see Yugi hovering over her)  
  
Thief: Ah!  
  
Yugi: Uh…what?  
  
Thief: Where am I?!  
  
Yugi: On the school bus.  
  
Thief: Since when do we take the school bus?  
  
Yugi: We're going on a field trip.  
  
Thief: Oh…to where?  
  
Selphie: The peanut factory!  
  
Thief: Okay…  
  
Locke: We have a low budget school.  
  
Thief: I can tell.  
  
(The bus rolls on)  
  
Thief: Why are we going to the peanut factory anyway?  
  
Locke: It was either this, or the button factory.  
  
Yuffie: I wanna see the buttons!  
  
Everyone but Yuffie: (Sweatdrop)  
  
Yuffie: What?  
  
(The bus stops and everyone gets off)  
  
Miss Teacher: Okay, now settle down.   
  
(The students all fall silent)  
  
Miss Teacher: Now I just need to put you into pairs and then we can enter the factory. Selphie you'll go with Yuffie.  
  
Selphie: Kay.  
  
Miss Teacher: Kaiba you'll go with Yugi.  
  
Kaiba: (Mutters) Darvit…  
  
Miss Teacher: Watch your mouth Kaiba. Mokuba you can go with Vivi.  
  
Mokuba: I wanna go with Seto!  
  
Kaiba: (Sweatdrop)   
  
Mokuba: Please! (Eyes grow all big and watery)  
  
Miss Teacher: No! What I say goes.  
  
Kaiba: (sighs)  
  
Miss Teacher: Joey you will go with Edgar.  
  
Joey: Say what?!  
Miss Teacher: Tristan you'll go with Serenity.  
  
Tristan: Yes!  
  
Joey: Watch it Tristan!  
  
Miss Teacher: Aeris you'll go with Tifa.  
  
Aeris: Okay.  
  
Tifa: Hmmph!  
  
Miss Teacher: Squall you'll go with Rinoa.  
  
(Rinoa has hearts in her eyes)  
  
Squall: Whatever…  
  
Miss Teacher: (Heehee this is so much fun) Mai you'll go with Garnet. Terra you'll go with Celes. Locke will go with Shadow. Sabin will go with Freya. Mog will go with Realm. Zidane will go with Quistis. Tidus will go with Wakka. Yuna will go with Rikku. Auron will go with Kimari. Siefer will go with Cloud. Thief will go with Bakura. Tea will go with this bottle of glue. And I'll go with all the leftovers. Okay?  
  
Bored Students: Yes, Miss Teacher.  
  
Miss Teacher: Good. Now let's start the field trip.  
  
(Everyone finds their partner and enter the building)  
  
Miss Teacher: Oh darn! We weren't supposed to go to the zoo! We were supposed to go to the peanut factory! Everyone back to the bus.  
  
Siefer: Miss Teacher, why don't we just stay here?  
  
Miss Teacher: Oh fine! Now remember stay with you partners and stick to the buddy system!   
  
(Miss Teacher puts a wristband on everyone)  
  
Aeris: What's this, the way to get back in?  
  
Miss teacher: No, if you try to leave your partner it shocks you. Now run off everyone!  
  
(Everyone except the leftovers leave)  
  
Tristan: Where do you want to go first Serenity?  
  
Serenity: I want to see the monkeys!  
  
Tristan: Cool! I love monkeys! I mean…wouldn't you rather go see the lions?  
  
Serenity: Okay…  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Yugi: I love monkeys!  
  
Kaiba: I hate monkeys. They're worthless creatures.  
  
Yugi: They are not! Some monkeys are trained to help the disabled.  
  
Kaiba: If they can't duel then they're worthless.  
  
(Silence)  
  
(Thief: This story is supposed to be about me! Get to me!)  
  
(I'll get there! Hold your horses)  
  
(Thief: Good.)  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Rinoa: Aren't the penguins cute!  
  
Squall: Whatever…  
  
Rinoa: They're adorable! I love penguins!  
  
Squall: Whatever…  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Miss Teacher: Stay together!  
  
Riku: (Grumbles)  
  
Sora: Why don't we just ditch her?  
  
Kairi: We can't. Our wristbands will just shock us.  
  
Sora: Oh yeah…  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
(Thief: You said you'd get to me!)  
  
(I didn't say when)  
  
(Thief: Pure evil I tell you…)  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Mokuba: I want cotton candy!  
  
Vivi: But we're at a zoo. They don't have any cotton candy here.  
  
Mokuba: I don't care I want cotton candy!  
  
Vivi: But…  
  
Mokuba: GET ME SOME COTTON CANDY!  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Tea: Monkeys!  
  
Glue: …  
  
Tea: Heehee! Silly glue! You tell the lamest jokes!  
  
Glue: …  
  
Tea: No you're stupid!  
  
Glue: …  
  
Tea: Shut up!  
  
Glue: …  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Selphie: (Is watching some snakes) I think I'd rather be at the peanut factory…  
  
Yuffie: Make it move!  
  
Selphie: How?  
  
Yuffie: I don't know…tap the glass or something.  
  
(Selphie leans forward and knocks on the glass)  
  
Selphie: Hey you snake! Do something!  
  
(The snake opens one of its eyes)  
  
Yuffie: Maybe it's going to move!  
  
Selphie: Yay!  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
(Thief: Are you going to me yet?)  
  
(No, not yet)  
  
(Thief: Why not?)  
  
(Because)  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Joey: Stupid monkey. Why won't they move?  
  
Edgar: So, what's Serenity's favorite color?  
  
Joey: Not you too! Look pal don't make me hurt ya!  
  
Edgar: What's her favorite song?  
  
Joey: Grr…  
  
Edgar: Think she'll go out with me?  
  
Joey: AHH!  
  
(Joey pushes Edgar into the monkey pit)  
  
Edgar: Ahh! Get me out of here!  
  
Joey: No!  
  
(Joey tries to leave, but gets shocked by his wristband)  
  
Joey: What the?  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
(Thief: Is it my turn?)  
  
(Yes)  
  
(Thief: Skwee!)  
  
Thief: So do you want to go see the monkeys?  
  
Bakura: I don't really like monkeys…  
  
Thief: How about the tigers?  
  
Bakura: I think I'll pass…  
  
Thief: The snakes?  
  
Bakura: I'd rather not…  
  
Thief: Will you at least get down from the tree?!  
  
Bakura: Look, I don't like zoos okay?!  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
(Thief: That was too short!)  
  
(So? Everyone else only got short parts)  
  
(Thief: (grumbles))  
  
(As I said-Meanwhile)  
  
Yugi: Look! Someone is down there with the monkeys!  
  
(Kaiba walks over to Yugi and looks down the pit. About ten monkeys were swarming over Edgar)  
  
Kaiba: Well I guess monkeys aren't all that worthless…  
  
Yugi: Someone should help him!  
  
Kaiba: Like who?  
  
Yugi: I don't know…  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Edgar: Joey! Help me!  
  
Joey: Okay, okay fine!  
  
(Joey jumps down in the pit. The monkeys don't really seem to notice him though)  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Tristan: Haha! Look at that ugly green monkey!  
  
Serenity: That's not a monkey that's Joey!  
  
Tristan: Joey?  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Rinoa: Squall lets stop and look at the monkeys.  
  
Squall: Whatever…  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Selphie: (Stares at the snake without blinking) I'm not moving from this spot until that snake moves!  
  
Some Person: There's a fight in the monkey pit!  
  
Other Person: FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT!  
  
Yuffie: (In a hypnotic tone) Must watch snake…  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Mokuba: Is that Joey down there?  
  
Vivi: I think so…  
  
Mokuba: Cool! I hope the monkeys throw a banana at him!  
  
Vivi: Why?  
  
Mokuba: I don't know, I just want to see how you can throw a banana.  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Thief: Sounds like there's a fight going on…  
  
Bakura: I don't care, I'm staying right here in this tree!  
  
Thief: C'mon, the zoo isn't that bad…  
  
Someone: Run! The lions have escaped!  
(Thief climbs the tree)  
  
Thief: On second thought, I think I'll stay with you…  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Edgar: Joey! Don't just stand there, help me!  
  
(Edgar throws a banana at Joey)  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Serenity: Hey! That ugly monkey threw a banana at Joey!  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Mokuba: So that's how you throw a banana…  
  
Vivi: (Sigh)  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Rinoa: Look at the monkeys!  
  
(A lion jumps into the pit)  
  
Edgar: Ahh!  
  
Joey: Holy cruddo! There's a lion in here!  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Yuffie: Must watch snake…  
  
Selphie: Must watch snake…  
  
Snake: (Sheesh, what morons…)  
  
(Meanwhile)   
  
Yugi: The…there's a lion in the pit!  
  
Kaiba: We can see that Yugi.  
  
Mokuba: Seto!  
  
(Mokuba and Vivi run towards Kaiba)  
  
Mokuba: Seto, I found you!  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Thief: Where do you think the lions went?  
  
Bakura: I don't know…  
  
(All of a sudden a lion comes and claws the trunk of the tree)  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Joey: Nice kitty…good kitty…  
  
Lion: ROAR!  
  
(All the monkeys run towards the lion)  
  
Edgar: …  
  
Joey: …  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Yuffie: Must watch snake…  
  
Selphie: Must watch snake…  
  
Yuffie: Must…ZzZzZzZz….  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Tristan: Joey, don't just stand there! The lion is distracted!  
  
Joey: Oh yeah!  
  
(Joey runs to help Edgar up)  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Bakura: Nice kitty…  
  
Lion: ROAR!  
  
(Bakura and Thief grab on to each other)  
  
Thief/Bakura: AHH!  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Edgar: Let's get out of here!  
  
(Joey and Edgar run out of the pit)  
  
Monkey: Oo oo ahh ahh! (Follow them!)  
  
Another Monkey: Eh… (Meh…)  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Selphie: Yuffie! I think it's going to move!  
  
(The snake closes its eye)  
  
Selphie/Yuffie: (Sweatdrop)  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Thief: What are we going to do?!  
  
Bakura: Let go of me first…  
  
Thief: Sorry…  
  
Bakura: Okay, on the count of three, we jump off the tree and make a run for it.  
  
Thief: Okay.  
  
Bakura: One…  
  
Thief: Two…  
  
Bakura/Thief: THREE!  
  
(They both jump out of the tree and run)  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Joey: Glad that's over with…  
  
Speaker: We're sorry, but do to certain conditions, the zoo is now closed.  
  
Miss Teacher: And thus concludes the tour.  
  
(Sora and Riku are all scratched up)  
  
Joey: What happened to you two?  
  
Sora: We walked by a tree and a lion jumped us.  
  
Riku: He stole my money!  
  
Miss Teacher: Everyone onto the bus!  
  
(Everyone gets on the bus)  
  
Tea: Did you have a good time Mr. Glue?  
  
Glue: …  
  
Tea: Me too!  
  
Selphie: This field trip bites. That snake just blinked!  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Snake: (Looks both ways and then starts dancing)  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Thief: I'll just be glad to get home.   
  
Bakura: Yes, so will I.  
  
Thief-Chan: oO; Just review, okay! 


	6. Camp Stupid

Thief-Chan: This can't be good...the insanity that happens when chibis and camp collide is not a very pretty sight...  
  
Disclaimer: Don't own Yu-gi-oh or squaresoft...yeah, yeah...  
  
Macavity: Thief? Thief wake up!  
  
Thief: Huh?  
  
Macavity: Yugi wants you to pack your things.  
  
Thief: Why?  
  
Macavity: Yugi doesn't know either. Mr. Moto just told him to pack up.  
  
Thief: Okay…  
  
(Thief starts to pack a few things)  
  
Thief: Why am I packing if it's a school day?  
  
Macavity: Hey, narrator, she's on to us.  
  
(Shh!)  
  
Thief: (Sweatdrop)  
  
(Thief continues packing)  
  
Yugi: Are you done packing yet?  
  
Thief: No, why?  
  
Yugi: You shouldn't pack winter clothes.  
  
Thief: Huh?  
  
Yugi: We're going to camp, didn't Macavity tell you?  
  
(Macavity jumps out the window)  
  
Thief: No, he didn't!  
  
Yugi: Oh, well camp is great! They have duel monster arenas there.  
  
Thief: Really?  
  
Yugi: Yeah...  
  
(Thief rushes around her room and stuffs her suitcases full)  
  
Thief: Ready!  
  
(Thief and Yugi leave and get on the bus that was conveniently waiting for them outside)  
  
Yugi: Whatever you do, don't go outside after dark.  
  
Yuffie: Never contradict the narrator.  
  
Terra: Don't talk to anyone you don't know.  
  
Locke: Always carry a good lock pick.  
  
Cait Sith: Don't eat the mystery meat.  
  
Bakura: And don't write home. The camp just forges fake letters from home anyway.  
  
Thief: Okay…  
  
(The bus stops and everyone gets off)  
  
Camp Person: Please go read the sign over there. It tells you what bunk you'll sleep in.  
  
(Thief finds her name under Bunk A. Her bunkmates were Ukira, TSF, and Aeris)  
  
Thief: Where's Bunk A?  
  
Bakura: It's over there. (Points to a bunk)  
  
Thief: Which bunk are you staying in?  
  
(Bakura reads list. Bakura's name falls under Bunk B along with Yugi, Kaiba, and Sora)  
  
Bakura: (Sounds horrified) The bunk next to yours…  
  
Thief: Yay! Then we can meet each other in the mornings!  
  
Bakura: Uh…right. (I sure hope I wake up before her…)  
  
Thief: I'd better go unpack. Bye!  
  
(Thief leaves for her bunk)  
  
Thief: This bunk sure is small.  
  
(So?)  
  
Thief: I'm just saying it's small!  
  
(Weren't you listening? Don't contradict a narrator)  
  
Ukira: Anyone in here?   
  
Thief: I am-  
  
Ukira: Oh, it's you.   
  
Thief: Hi.  
  
Ukira: Hi.  
  
(TSF walks in carrying many large suitcases)  
  
TSF: Darn soda machine weighs a ton…  
  
Aeris: Let me help you with that.  
  
TSF: Thief? You're here at camp as well?  
  
Thief: Yeah…  
  
TSF: Cool!  
  
Thief: Did you take what I think you took?  
  
TSF: You mean this?  
  
(TSF opens a large suitcase and pulls her soda machine out)  
  
Thief: (Sweatdrop) Yes, that…  
  
TSF: I thought if I went to camp, I'd make a great profit with this machine.  
  
Thief: You really need to go back to your planet TSF. Shoes are just used as footwear here, not currency.  
  
Aeris: Currency? You mean you use shoes for money?  
  
TSF: Is that a problem?  
  
Aeris: Never mind…  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Macavity: Yes! I have the whole house to myself.  
  
(Walks out of Thief's room)  
  
Macavity: I guess I'll go raid the fridge.  
  
Mr. Moto: Ah! The cat can-(Sneezes) talk!  
  
Macavity: (Sweatdrop) I think I'm in trouble.  
  
(Meanwhile)  
  
Thief: So what do we do now?  
  
Ukira: It's getting late shouldn't you unpack?  
  
Thief: I guess so…  
  
(Thief starts unpacking her things)  
  
Ukira: Those are some nice earrings…  
  
Thief: Uh…thanks.  
  
Ukira: Can I borrow them?  
  
(Yami Thief: Whatever you do, don't give anyone those earrings!)  
  
Thief: Um…I think I should keep them.  
  
Ukira: Okay…  
  
(Beatrix walks in the bunk)  
  
Beatrix: Lights out!  
  
Aeris: But it's only 7:00pm.  
  
Beatrix: Look! I'm your bunk leader, and the rules state lights out at 7:00.  
  
Ukira: (Grumbles as she turns the lights off)  
  
Beatrix: Now go to sleep! We expect you to be up at 5:00am.  
  
TSF: FIVE IN THE MORNING?!  
  
Beatrix: Yes, five.  
  
(Beatrix leaves as they all go to sleep)  
  
Thief: I refuse to go to sleep at seven o' clock.  
  
(Too bad)  
  
Thief: (Grumbles)  
  
(Thief falls asleep) 


	7. Intermission One

Thief-Chan: I'd like to say, read 'A Crazy Yu-Gi-Oh story by mirai-torankusu. It's a hilarious story that makes me laugh because it's...cool...and...stuff...yeah...  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh or Squaresoft  
  
(Here is video taped information by Thief, Ukira, and TSF. Macavity is the camera operator)  
  
Thief: Hello I'm Thief.  
  
TSF: I'm The Shoe Fairy.  
  
Ukira: And I'm Ukira.  
  
Thief: We've decided to call an intermission for this part of the story to clear some information up. In the beginning I was visiting some guy named Mister. Now in real life I wouldn't have been called to him, because I'm not insane and neither is TSF,  
  
TSF: Can't say the same for Ukira…  
  
Ukira: Thief is more insane than I am! She even argues with the narrator.  
  
TSF: Too true, she even hears voices in her head.  
  
Thief: I'M NOT SCHIZOPHRENIC!  
  
TSF: Now did we say you were?  
  
Ukira: Sheesh Thief, touchy aren't you?  
  
Thief: (Grumbles) Another mistake made in this story is the incident on the plane.  
  
TSF: Oh…which incident on the plane?  
  
Thief: The one with Macavity.  
  
TSF: Oh yes. Macavity can't escape out of a pet carrier.  
  
Thief: At least not mine.  
  
Macavity: Point taken, now move on!  
  
Thief: Of course; now about the narrator…  
  
TSF: The narrator is probably Z in disguise.  
  
Ukira: Wouldn't put it past her…  
  
Thief: (Clears throat) In reality. I'd never argue or contradict a narrator. I've learned that from going on a twisted quest.  
  
Ukira: Was there a narrator for the quest?  
  
TSF: Not as far as I know.  
  
Thief: Shut up! Next thing is the suitcase incident. A suitcase can't knock me out.  
  
Ukira: Coincidently Alice can.  
  
Thief: For the last time! I won that battle!  
  
TSF: Sure you did Thief. (winks)  
  
Thief: Grr…I guess the next thing I'd like to clear up are those awful uniforms.  
  
All: (Shudder)  
  
Thief: I'd never wear those awful uniforms! NEVER!  
  
TSF: Nor would I.  
  
Ukira: Or me.  
  
Thief: Okay, the next thing I'd like to say is that I have never had a dream about Z, and she never talks to me through someone else's voice.  
  
TSF: I thought you didn't hear voices.  
  
Thief: (Sweatdrop) Oh yes, and about my Yami. Don't ask me why my Yami is a he, ask him!  
  
TSF: (Falls on the floor laughing) That is so funny!  
  
Thief: How is it funny?  
  
Ukira: It's official; TSF has lost it.  
  
Thief: You're slow to realize things aren't you? She lost it long ago.  
  
Ukira: Point taken.  
  
Yami Thief: I don't see what is so funny!  
  
Thief: How are you here if I'm here?  
  
Yami Thief: (sigh) Fine I'll leave! (disappears)  
  
Thief: TSF get up!  
  
TSF: (Stops laughing and stands up) Fine…  
  
Thief: Okay, next was the test. Some people don't seem to want to believe that I'm smart. Yes I could finish a test quickly, I'm not stupid just eccentric!  
  
Ukira: (Cough) Sure…  
  
TSF: Don't worry Thief we believe you. (Cheesy smile)  
  
Macavity: Just get on with it!  
  
Thief: Okay, now Bakura would like to say something about the earring incident at lunch.  
  
Bakura: I have NEVER in my life said 'Great Scott' so stop asking me to say it.  
  
(Which isn't true…)  
  
Thief: Isn't he cute when he's angry?!  
  
TSF: Thief! C'mon, there are enough Bakura fans as is.  
  
Bakura: (Sweatdrop)  
  
Thief: So? What's your point?  
  
Ukira: Kaiba is better.  
  
Thief: Is not! Take that back!  
  
Ukira: Make me!  
  
(Thief jumps at Ukira and they start fighting)  
  
Bakura: Should I be worried?  
  
TSF: No, this happens all the time.  
  
(An hour later)  
  
Thief: (Brushes dust out of her hair) Now where was I…  
  
TSF: You were just about to clear up the duel.  
  
Thief: Oh yeah! The duel with Selphie wasn't all that well thought out. I'll make a better one with fewer contradictions.  
  
Ukira: Which means it will be worse than the last one.  
  
Macavity: Stop fighting all ready!  
  
TSF: Er, and I'd like to clear up that Yugi incident. It's not true!  
  
Ukira: Sure it isn't…  
  
TSF: It's not!  
  
Thief: Prove it!   
  
(Pulls Yugi in the room)  
  
TSF: Yugi! (glomps)  
  
Ukira: You're both pathetic!  
  
Thief: What I never did anything like that.  
  
Ukira: Macavity, play the tape.  
  
(Thief: Sephy I'm your biggest fan! You are the best Final Fantasy villain in the whole entire world! (glomps Mr. Sephy))  
  
Thief: (Sweatdrop) It's not what it looks like!  
  
Yugi: (Sweatdrop)  
  
Bakura: Can someone untie me?  
  
Thief: No! You're mine! (Glomps)  
  
Ukira: (Sigh) I can't win, can I?  
  
Macavity: I don't have all day here!  
  
Thief: Okay, okay.   
  
TSF: Oh yes, about me paying Rikku with a shoe…  
  
Ukira: See what hanging around Thief does to people?  
  
Thief: I didn't do anything!  
  
TSF: Besides shoes are worth a lot to me. It's hard to part with them!  
  
Thief: …  
  
Ukira: …  
  
Bakura: …  
  
Yugi: …  
  
Macavity: Anyway…  
  
Thief: (Clears throat) Okay, now about the field trip. I don't know how we ended up at the zoo when we were heading for a peanut factory.  
  
TSF: What's a peanut factory anyway?  
  
Ukira: I always thought peanuts were grown on farms, not made in factories.  
  
Macavity: What about the lions?  
  
Thief: Oh yeah! It wasn't me who let those lions out so stop calling me!  
  
Bakura: I hate lions…  
  
Thief: It's okay the lions are gone! (Glomps)  
  
Bakura: Could you let go of me?  
  
Thief: Fine!   
  
Macavity: Clear up the talking monkey thing.  
  
Thief: Oh yeah. The monkeys were arguing about whether or not they should chase after Joey and Edgar.   
  
Macavity: Okay, what about when you learned whose bunk was next to yours?  
  
Thief: (Narrows eyes) Shut up Macavity.  
  
TSF: Ooh! I'd love to hear her explain that.  
  
Bakura: I wouldn't…  
  
Ukira: (Starts laughing) Thief is so stupid!  
  
Thief: Oh that's it! You're going to pay for that Ukira!  
  
Ukira: Bring it on!  
  
(An hour later)  
  
Macavity: My arm is getting tired can I turn the camera off?  
  
Thief: No! Don't make me go back to the story!  
  
Macavity: Why not?  
  
Thief: Who knows what can happen in the story…  
  
Macavity: It's better than this madness…  
  
TSF: What? You mean us just talking?  
  
Macavity: Yes, that exactly!  
  
TSF: Out of curiosity, how do you throw a banana? 


	8. 500 laps around the lake and Intermissio...

Thief-Chan: How random can this story get? Oh yeah, thanks to TsukiMegami for the pack of cards! *Drives away in Kaiba's limo*  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own, yeah...  
  
(Thief sighs and walks out to the mess hall which was empty)  
  
Thief: Anyone here?  
  
(I just said the mess hall was empty)  
  
Thief: Okay! Sheesh…  
  
(Thief sits down at a table)  
  
Thief: What am I doing in the mess hall anyway? It's 4:30 am!  
  
(What do I know? I'm just the narrator!)  
  
Thief: (Grumbles)  
  
Ukira: What are you doing in here?  
  
Thief: (Looks up) I could ask you the same question.  
  
Ukira: I couldn't sleep, so I decided to explore. What are you doing here?  
  
Thief: The narrator made me come.  
  
Ukira: …  
  
Thief: What?  
  
Ukira: Never mind.  
  
Thief: Well, I'm out of here. I don't know why I came here in the first place.  
  
(Thief leaves the mess hall and walks out to the beach)  
  
Thief: There's a beach here?  
  
(I just said, you went to the beach)  
  
Thief: Okay…  
  
(Thief stares out at the magnificent sea)  
  
Thief: Wow, the sea looks magnificent.  
  
Ukira: Indeed it does.  
  
Thief: What the?! How do you do that?  
  
Ukira: Why are you wondering around so early in the morning?  
  
Thief: Why are you?  
  
Ukira: I came out looking for you.  
  
Thief: Well, I can't control what the narrator makes me do.  
  
(Thief and Ukira head back to their bunk and go back to sleep)  
  
Intermission Two:  
  
(Thief, Ukira, and TSF appear on the screen)  
  
Thief: …  
  
Ukira: …  
  
TSF: …  
  
Thief: Okay, now that was just scary.  
  
TSF: Do you do that in real life?  
  
Ukira: No! It was just created by the writer in order to create suspense!  
  
Thief: Good. I was getting worried.  
  
Bakura: Why? You follow me everywhere I go.  
  
Thief: I do not! I have dignity you know.  
  
Bakura: Okay, almost everywhere.  
  
Thief: Yup!  
  
Macavity: You're all weird.  
  
Thief: Would you rather us discuss something else?  
  
Macavity: I'd rather we get back to the story.  
  
Thief: No! I hate the story! It's boring.  
  
Macvavity: So?  
  
Thief: …  
  
End of Intermission Two.  
  
(A loud horn blows)  
  
TSF: Ah! (Falls off her bed)  
  
Aeris: Huh?   
  
Ukira: (Throws a pillow at the door)  
  
Thief: Wha?! (Looks up from under her bed)  
  
Beatrix: Wake up!  
  
(Everyone groans as they get up and go outside)  
  
Beatrix: Good morning everyone.  
  
Thief: Uh…  
  
TSF: Give me another five hours to wake up…  
  
Aeris: ZzZzZz…  
  
Ukira: (Falls to floor)  
  
Beatriz: I said, 'GOOD MORNING EVERYONE!'  
  
Everyone: Good morning Beatrix…  
  
Beatrix: Better.  
  
Thief: How come we're the only ones here?  
  
Beatrix: Everyone else is asleep.  
  
(Everyone except Beatrix face faults)  
  
Thief: Then why did we have to wake up so early?!  
  
Beatrix: So I can see how strong you all are! (Blows a whistle) First push-ups!  
  
(The four of them get on the ground and start doing push-ups)  
  
Thief: I don't see what the point of this is…  
  
Ukira: I'm so tired…  
  
TSF: I hate push-ups…  
  
Aeris: I can't take it anymore!  
  
Beatrix: 500 more to go!  
  
(Meanwhile in Bunk B)  
  
Yugi: Is anyone awake?  
  
Bakura: I am.  
  
Yugi: What are you doing under your bed?  
  
Bakura: Oh, nothing…  
  
Sora: Shh! You'll wake up Kaiba…  
  
Kaiba: Why yes, I do have the only existing Blue Eyes in the world…of course I'm the best…yes you can have my autograph…No make it twelve thousand dollars…  
  
Yugi: …  
  
Bakura: …  
  
Sora: That's kinda creepy…  
  
Bakura: You said it.  
  
(Meanwhile with Thief…)  
  
Beatrix: Okay, your second task is swimming. Everyone will swim laps around the field.  
  
Thief: That doesn't seem that hard…  
  
Beatrix: 500 laps!  
  
TSF: WHAT?!  
  
Aeris: I can't swim!  
  
Ukira: It's too cold!  
  
Thief: 500?!  
  
Beatrix: GO!  
  
(Beatrix blows her whistle and they start swimming)  
  
Aeris: (Glub, glub)  
  
Ukira: Shouldn't someone help her?  
  
TSF: Meh…  
  
(Meanwhile with Bunk B)  
  
Sora: Oh great. The lights went out…  
  
Yugi: No problem, I'll just open the door.   
  
(Yugi walks into the wall)  
  
Yugi: Ouch! Assuming I can find the door…  
  
Bakura: Ah!  
  
Yugi/Sora: What?!  
  
Bakura: SPIDER!  
  
Sora: (Sweatdrop)  
  
(Meanwhile with Thief…)  
  
(Thief, Ukira, TSF, and Aeris are sopping wet)  
  
Beatrix: Next 500 laps around the lake!  
  
Thief: Please make it stop!  
  
Ukira: I think I'm going to feint!  
  
Aeris: I need to lie down!  
  
TSF: I'm thirsty.  
  
(Meanwhile in Bunk B)  
  
Sora: I think I found the door!  
  
Yugi: Open it!  
  
Bakura: Ow! That's my foot!  
  
Sora: Oops…  
  
Yugi: How are we going to find the door?  
  
Kaiba: Yes! Die Yugi!  
  
Yugi: …  
  
Bakura: …  
  
Sora: …  
  
(Meanwhile with Bunk A)  
  
Beatrix: All right that's all for our morning activities. Dismissed!  
  
(Beatrix leaves)  
  
Ukira: What time is it?  
  
TSF: 7:00am  
  
Ukira: SEVEN?!  
  
Thief: Great…  
  
Aeris: I'm going back to bed…  
  
TSF: I'm going to the mess hall.  
  
Ukira: I think I'll go too.  
  
Thief: I'll see you guys later!  
  
(Thief walks into Bunk A and grabs her earrings)  
  
Thief: Just in case.  
  
Thief-Chan: Now review! Or else! 


	9. Camp is evil

Thief-Chan: *Falls asleep on her keyboard*  
  
Disclaimer: jfnbklsenboenblsnbodsbmdb  
  
Intermission Three:  
  
(Thief, Ukira, and TSF appear on the screen)  
  
Thief: Hello, I'm Thief, and I'm not schizophrenic.  
  
TSF: I'm The Shoe Fairy, and I'm not in denial.  
  
Ukira: I'm Ukira, and I don't know them.  
  
Macavity: For a black mage, a fairy, and an Esper you three sure are weak.  
  
Thief: I beg your pardon?  
  
Macavity: You couldn't even run 500 laps around a field.  
  
Thief: Look! Whose story is this?!  
  
Macavity: And shouldn't faeries be able to fly?  
  
TSF: Watch it cat!  
  
Macavity: Okay…  
  
Ukira: …  
  
TSF: Poor Yugi, he walked into the wall…  
  
Ukira: (Sigh) I can't win can I?  
  
Macavity: Must you repeat that?  
  
Ukira: Yes.  
  
Thief: Well, I'm just glad there aren't any spiders here!  
  
Bakura: You're worse than a spider!  
  
Thief: Am not silly! (Glomps)  
  
Bakura: Untie me!  
  
Thief: No!  
  
Yugi: Can I go now?  
  
End of Intermission  
  
(TSF grabbed a tray of what at least smelt like food and sat down next to Ukira)  
  
Ukira: How long have you known Thief?  
  
TSF: I don't remember…it was a long time ago.  
  
(TSF takes a bite of her food, but spits it out)  
  
TSF: This stuff tastes horrible!  
  
Ukira: Is it even food?  
  
TSF: Eep! It moved!  
  
(The two trays of food jump off the table and walk away)  
  
Ukira: That was…  
  
TSF: Odd…  
  
(Meanwhile in Bunk B)  
  
Bakura: Well, it's a good thing the sun is up.  
  
  
  
Sora: I'm out of here.  
  
(Sora gets up and heads for the door. The door opens and Vegeta walks in)  
  
Vegeta: Where do you think you're going?!  
  
Sora: T…to the mess hall.  
  
Vegeta: Not on my watch! (Blows a whistle) Everyone outside!  
  
(Vegeta leaves and watches the door)  
  
Yugi: Great…  
  
Bakura: Just what we need…  
  
Kaiba: …  
  
Sora: Uh…who's going to wake up Kaiba?  
  
Yugi: Just let Vegeta handle it.  
  
(Meanwhile with Thief)  
  
(Thief walks beside a small river)  
  
Thief: What am I doing here? (Sigh)  
  
(Thief stares at the river with her eyes closed)  
  
Yami Thief: What are you doing here?  
  
Thief: That's what I'd like to know…  
  
Yami Thief: Well, I'm not staying here. Make sure no one but you touches your earrings.  
  
Thief: Okay.  
  
Yami Thief: See ya. (Leaves as Thief opens her eyes)  
  
(Thief sits down by the river in silence)  
  
Thief: I guess I can practice magic here.   
  
(Thief starts to glow light purple as she turns into her Esper form)  
  
(Meanwhile with Bunk B)  
  
Vegeta: Where is Kaiba?  
  
Bakura: Kaiba is still asleep.  
  
(Vegeta walks in Bunk B)  
  
Kaiba: …  
  
Vegeta: What a wimp! Sleeping like a little baby. WAKE UP!  
  
(Kaiba is startled and falls off his bed)  
  
Vegeta: Get dressed you brat.  
  
(Vegeta leaves)  
  
Kaiba: What was that all about?  
  
(Meanwhile with TSF)  
  
TSF: I'm never eating here again…  
  
Ukira: How will you survive then?  
  
TSF: Maybe Thief can think of something…  
  
Ukira: Where is she?  
  
TSF: I don't know.  
  
Ukira: Well, let's go find her.  
  
TSF: Kay.  
  
(Meanwhile with Thief)  
  
(Thief starts glowing brighter)  
  
???: How do you do that?  
  
(Thief turns back to normal and stands up alarmed)  
  
Thief: Who's there?  
  
???: Why do you want to know?  
  
Thief: Your voice sounds familiar.  
  
???: Well yours isn't familiar to me.  
  
(Thief turns around and sees someone sitting in a tree)  
  
Thief: So?  
  
???: My name is Trunks.  
  
Thief: Mine is Thief.  
  
Trunks: So you're the one Joey was talking about.  
  
Thief: Wheeler?  
  
Trunks: Yup.   
  
Thief: What are you doing up there anyway?  
  
Trunks: Well, I was training out here when I decided to climb this tree.  
  
Thief: Okay…  
  
Trunks: What are you doing here?  
  
Thief: I was…uh…  
  
(Trunks jumps down from the tree)  
  
Trunks: Are you a Saiyan?  
  
Thief: Uh…  
  
Trunks: Don't worry, I am too.  
  
Thief: That's not what I-  
  
Trunks: It's okay, I won't tell anyone.  
  
Thief: (Sweatdrop) Uh…yeah!  
  
(Meanwhile with Bunk B)  
  
Vegeta: Now that we're all here, drop and give me 50!  
  
Sora: 50 doesn't sound too bad.  
  
Vegeta: Thousand! NOW!  
  
Bakura: What did I do to deserve this?  
  
Kaiba: I refuse to do any push-ups.  
  
Vegeta: Oh really? Then I suppose you'd rather I go get your brother and have him do them for you?  
  
(Kaiba grumbles as he gets on the ground and starts doing push-ups)  
  
Yugi: Almost there…One!  
  
Sora: So tired….  
  
(Meanwhile with TSF)  
  
TSF: Hmm…if I was Thief, where would I be?  
  
Ukira: If I know her as well as I think I do-  
  
TSF: Which you don't.  
  
Ukira: (Ignores TSF) Then she's wherever Bakura is.  
  
TSF: Well that actually makes sense.  
  
Ukira: Find Bakura, and we find Thief.  
  
TSF: Okay, well where is Bakura?  
  
Ukira: Hmm…  
  
(Meanwhile with Thief)  
  
Thief: I got to go…  
  
Trunks: Er…okay.  
  
(Thief walks away)  
  
Thief: Well that was odd. Now what the heck is a Saiyan?   
  
(Thief walks near a cabin)  
  
Thief: I wonder what's in here…  
  
(Thief enters the cabin)  
  
Thief: Hello? Sheesh this narrator is so annoying…  
  
(Thief walks up to a door)  
  
Thief: I wonder what's in here.  
  
(Thief tries to open the door, but it's locked)  
  
Thief: Darn. Oh wait…  
  
(Thief uses one of her earrings to open the door)  
  
Thief: Hello?  
  
???: Yes?  
  
Thief: Er…  
  
(Meanwhile with Bunk B)  
  
Vegeta: Faster you weaklings!  
  
Yugi: I'm going as fast as I can! Three…  
  
Bakura: I wasn't built to do push-ups…  
  
Sora: If my feet weren't so big I'd be done by now.  
  
Kaiba: 20,000. 20,001. 20,002…  
  
Vegeta: 50,000 is for weaklings! I would have finished long ago.  
  
(Meanwhile with TSF)  
  
TSF: Okay, if you were Bakura where would you go?  
  
Ukira: I'd be hiding from Thief.  
  
TSF: Where?  
  
Ukira: In my bunk, Thief can't go there.  
  
TSF: So let's head to Bunk B!  
  
(Ukira and TSF walk over to Bunk B)  
  
(Meanwhile with Thief)  
  
Thief: Who's there?  
  
???: Who're you?  
  
Thief: I'm Thief. Now tell me who you are.   
  
???: My name is Chrysa.  
  
Thief: What a dorky name  
  
(Thief turns on a light and stares at Chrysa. Chrysa has green-blue hair and blue eyes)  
  
Chrysa: Don't mock my name.  
  
Thief: I beg your pardon?  
  
Chrysa: I can tell you think my name is stupid.  
  
Thief: (Sweatdrop) Uh…that's not true.  
  
Chrysa: Sure!  
  
Thief-Chan: Sorry to leave you hanging there. Please review! 


	10. Vegeta is a tough leader

Thief-Chan: Nothing to really say this time.  
  
Disclaimer: ((Insert disclamer and lame joke))  
  
Intermission Three:  
  
(Thief, Ukira, TSF, and Chrysa appear on the screen)  
  
Thief: Hello. I'm Thief, the Esper/Sumoner.  
  
TSF: I'm The Shoe Fairy, the fairy.  
  
Ukira: I'm Ukira, the Black Mage.  
  
Chrysa: I'm Chrysa, the-  
  
Thief: The annoying brat.  
  
TSF: The cry baby.  
  
Ukira: The giggle box.  
  
Chrysa: Take that back!  
  
Thief: No!  
  
Chrysa: (Clears throat) I'm Chrysa, the healer.  
  
TSF: (Cough)  
  
Chrysa: What was that for?  
  
TSF: Healer my backpack!  
  
(Thief bursts out laughing)  
  
Ukira: It's not even funny Thief.  
  
Thief: Maybe not to you.  
  
Macavity: Okay, pay attention here!  
  
Thief: Sorry. Are there any questions Macavity?  
  
Macavity: Okay, what was the food the cafeteria served?  
  
Ukira: I wouldn't consider it food…  
  
TSF: I think it was supposed to bacon.  
  
Chrysa: BACON?!  
  
Macavity: Okay, how come Vegeta wasn't turned into a Chibi?  
  
Chrysa: Or Beatrix…  
  
Thief: Well, they wouldn't make very good Chibi's, so I thought that they would make the perfect….what's the word?  
  
TSF: Shoes?  
  
Thief: Uh…yeah I'll go with shoes.  
  
Macavity: (Sweatdrop) Okay, well, what is up with Kaiba?  
  
Thief: (Starts laughing)  
  
Ukira: (Sweatdrop) It's not funny…  
  
TSF: I guess tough ol' Kaiba likes to sleep in.  
  
Chrysa: I don't get it.  
  
Thief/TSF: (Face fault)  
  
Macavity: Okay, how come Trunks thinks you're a Saiyan?  
  
Thief: I guess seeing me glow made him think I was a Saiyan.  
  
TSF: A Saiyan doesn't glow purple.  
  
Thief: Well, how was he supposed to know?!  
  
TSF: Whatever…  
  
Macavity: Okay. Hmm…what about the whole, 'Find Bakura, we'll find Thief,' thing.  
  
Thief: (Eyes narrow) Yes, please explain that Ukira.  
  
TSF: (Grins)  
  
Ukira: Look, it was the author not me!  
  
Thief: (Pouts) Sure!  
  
Chrysa: (Blinks)  
  
Macavity: What about the guys having to do so many push-ups?  
  
TSF: We thought it wasn't fair that we had to get up earlier than them, so we gave them more to do.  
  
Thief: Poor Bakura, I hope he's okay.  
  
Bakura: I'll be okay if you untie me.  
  
Thief: No, that's not how I do things.  
  
Ukira: (Rolls eyes)  
  
Chrysa: Why are you guys so obsessed with Anime?  
  
(Silence)  
  
Macavity: You shouldn't have said that…  
  
Bakura: Oh dear…  
  
Chrysa: What?  
  
Thief: Get her!  
  
(Five minutes later)  
  
TSF: Does that answer your question?  
  
Chrysa: (Nods frightened)  
  
Thief: Now pick an Anime before I pull out AMOD again!  
  
Chrysa: Not Yu-gi-oh, Yugi and Bakura are gone…  
  
TSF/Thief: Got that right…  
  
Chrysa: Not Final Fantasy…  
  
Ukira: …  
  
Chrysa: Trunks is obviously Ukira's…  
  
Ukira: WHAT?!  
  
Chrysa: Oh wait, you haven't read the whole story have you?  
  
Ukira: Grr…THIEF!  
  
Thief: Hey, don't look at me!  
  
Chrysa: Gohan is Videl's…I got it!  
  
Thief: Huh?  
  
Chrysa: It will be-  
  
(To be continued…actually not really, but you can think it will be)  
  
Thief: What are you doing here?  
  
Chrysa: Practising magic.   
  
Thief: Magic?  
  
Chrysa: Oops…  
  
Thief: It's okay, I use magic too.  
  
Chrysa: Oh. (sighs) Good!  
  
Thief: Which Bunk are you in?  
  
Chrysa: I don't have a bunk, I sleep in here.  
  
Thief: Oh…kay…  
  
(Meanwhile with Bunk B)  
  
((Please note that the current time is 3:00))  
  
Vegeta: (Blasts the ground) Hurry up you weaklings!   
  
Bakura: (Almost there…)  
  
Yugi: (Fifty-eight…)  
  
Sora: (I can't take it anymore!)  
  
Kaiba: 50,000. Done.  
  
(Kaiba gets off the ground)  
  
((A/N: Don't ask how it is possible))  
  
Kaiba: Can I go now?  
  
Vegeta: I suppose. But only because I don't want to stare at your pathetic face anymore.  
  
(Kaiba leaves muttering)  
  
Vegeta: What number are you on?!  
  
Bakura: 40,000 Sir Vegeta.  
  
((A/N: Or that...))  
  
Yugi: 59…  
  
Sora: I lost count…  
  
(Meanwhile with TSF)  
  
(TSF is on the floor laughing)  
  
TSF: Look at them! They're so weak!  
  
Ukira: Kaiba finished already.  
  
TSF: Who cares? Kaiba is stupid.  
  
Ukira: TAKE THAT BACK!  
  
TSF: Sheesh…  
  
Ukira: Everyone knows Kaiba is the coolest.  
  
TSF: No he's not, Yami is!  
  
Ukira: What planet do you live on? Kaiba has everything from his Blue Eyes, to a mansion, to a really cool jacket!  
  
TSF: Oh yeah? Well Yami was a Pharaoh!  
  
(Meanwhile with Thief)  
  
Thief: I wonder where Yami is…  
  
(Thief walks up to Bunk Z)  
  
Thief: Bunk Z?  
  
(Thief enters the Bunk to see all the Yamis playing cards)  
  
Yami Yugi: I see your dime and raise you a nickel.  
  
Yami Bakura: I see your nickel and raise you a dollar.  
  
Yami Malik: I see your dollar and raise you a twenty.  
  
Yami Thief: (Sweatdrop) I fold.  
  
Yami Yugi: Uh…I fold too.  
  
Yami Bakura: I fold as well.  
  
Yami Thief: Out of curiosity, what did you have?  
  
Yami Malik: Nothing! I just thought you'd back down like the cowards you are!  
  
(Yami Bakura stands up and throws his cards on the floor. Yami Yugi stands up and holds him back from charging at Malik)  
  
Yami Bakura: All right that's it! I banish you to the Shadow Realm!  
  
(Yami Thief falls of his chair laughing)  
  
Yami Malik: (Sweatdrop)  
  
Thief: What are you guys doing?!  
  
Everyone but Thief: (Sweatdrop) Uh…  
  
(Meanwhile with Bunk B)  
  
Vegeta: Faster! I don't have all day you know!  
  
Bakura: We're going as fast as we can…  
  
Yugi: (69…)  
  
Sora: Speak for yourself! I had to start all over!  
  
(Meanwhile with TSF)  
  
TSF: Okay, now this is just getting sad. Can't you cast a spell on them or something?  
  
Ukira: Hey, you're the 'fairy of hope'  
  
TSF: Oh yeah.  
  
(TSF turns invisible and walks behind Vegeta)  
  
Bakura: I'm so very tired…  
  
Yugi: I can't do anymore…  
  
Sora: DARN! I lost count again.  
  
TSF: (Keeps herself from giggling as she pulls Vegeta's watch out of his pocket)  
  
Vegeta: Faster you weaklings!  
  
Yugi: We're going! (73)  
  
Bakura: I can't go on…  
  
Sora: Darn these big shoes!  
  
TSF: (Casts a spell on the watch to change the time to eight)  
  
Vegeta: Hurry up! It's past curfew!  
  
Bakura: 50,000. I'm done sir.  
  
Vegeta: Then get back to your bunk. NOW!  
  
(Bakura leaves)  
  
TSF: (I guess Yugi and Sora still need more help)   
  
(Casts a movement spell on Yugi and Sora to make them go faster)  
  
Yugi: 10,000. 10,001. 10,002. 10,003. 10,004…  
  
Sora: 20,000. 20,001. 20,002. 20,003. 20,004…  
  
(A half-hour later)  
  
Sora: Done!  
  
(Sora leaves)  
  
TSF: (Hurry up Yugi…)  
  
Yugi: Done!  
  
Vegeta: Now get out of my sight!  
  
(Yugi leaves and TSF heads back to her bunk)  
  
(Meanwhile with Bunk Z)  
  
Thief: Hey Yami.  
  
Yami Thief: Yes?  
  
Thief: What else can my earrings do?  
  
Yami Thief: Why don't you try using them as a Sumoner? I think you'll find it quite interesting.  
  
Thief: Eh, what time is it?  
  
Yami Thief: It's 9:00pm. Why?  
  
Thief: DARVIT, IT'S PAST CURFEW!  
  
(Thief rushes out of the bunk)  
  
(Meanwhile at Bunk A)  
  
Ukira: Where do you think Thief is?  
  
TSF: I don't know, but if she doesn't hurry back, she's going to get in trouble.  
  
Ukira: Well, it was your fault for casting that time spell.  
  
TSF: So?  
  
Ukira: …  
  
Aeris: Shh! I'm trying to sleep!  
  
TSF: (Just wait until you're older. You'll be doing a lot more sleep than you think…)  
  
(The door bursts open and Thief runs to her bed)  
  
TSF: What took you so long?  
  
Ukira: Yeah, where were you?  
  
Thief: Playing poker.  
  
Ukira/TSF: (Sweatdrop)  
  
Thief: What?  
  
(Beatrix enters)  
  
Beatrix: THIEF! IT'S PAST CURFEW!  
  
Thief: I know, I'm going to sleep…  
  
Beatrix: You just got here! I know just what to do with you…  
  
Thief: What?  
  
Beatrix: You'll see.  
  
(Beatrix leaves and Bunk A goes to sleep)  
  
(Meanwhile in Bunk B)  
  
Sora: Ow. I don't think I can sleep after 50,000 push-ups.  
  
Yugi: I'm just glad I finished.  
  
Bakura: My arms are sore.  
  
Kaiba: …  
  
Sora: How come he can sleep all peacefully?  
  
Yugi: We'd better go to sleep.  
  
(Yugi turns his flashlight off. Everyone but Bakura falls asleep)  
  
Bakura: (Darn, I can't get to sleep. Maybe if I take a small walk…)  
  
(Bakura heads outside and walks over to the swimming pool)  
  
Bakura: I wonder…  
  
Chrysa: Wonder what?  
  
Bakura: Gah! (Turns around)  
  
Chrysa: Hi! (waves)  
  
Bakura: What are you doing here?  
  
Chrysa: I decided to go for a walk. What's your excuse?  
  
Bakura: I couldn't sleep.  
  
Chrysa: Do you know that girl Thief?  
  
Bakura: Yes, why?  
  
Chrysa: Does she have earrings?  
  
Bakura: Yes…  
  
Chrysa: Are they black with a white center?  
  
Bakura: Yes…  
  
Chrysa: Yay! I found the right person then!  
  
Bakura: (Sweatdrop)  
  
Chrysa: You may now go back to whatever you were doing. Bye!  
  
(Chrysa touches a bracelet on her wrist and disappears. Bakura gets startled and falls into back into the pool)  
  
Bakura: Ah! (Waves his arms around)  
  
(Meanwhile…)  
  
Macavity: Look, I already told you everything I know.  
  
Mr. Moto: All you've told me is 'meow'.  
  
Macavity: Well that's all I know. You're the one who is talking to a cat.  
  
Thief-Chan: Thankysai! Please review. 


	11. I wouldn't eat their cooking

Thief-Chan: I'm sorry if the chapters are short. I've already divided these into sections and they are all pretty short. Hopefully they'll get longer when I get around to typing.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anything; I'm poor.  
  
(Thief falls asleep into a dream)  
  
Yami Thief: Thief…  
  
Thief: Yes?  
  
Yami Thief: You must learn more about your millennium item.  
  
Thief: Why?  
  
Yami Thief: If you don't learn how to control it, then a thief could easily take it away from you.  
  
Thief: A thief? Like who?  
  
Yami Thief: Bakura.  
  
Thief: BAKURA?! He wouldn't steal it from me!  
  
Yami Thief: Can you say the same about his Yami?  
  
Thief: …  
  
Yami Thief: Or Malik.  
  
Thief: Malik is here?  
  
Yami Thief: (Nods) You really need to reconsider your friends. You may think you know TSF and Ukira, but how can you be so sure?  
  
(Thief wakes up and stares at the ceiling)  
  
Thief: (Maybe I should reconsider my friends…but who can I trust?)  
  
(Meanwhile with Bakura)  
  
Beatrix: What do we have here?  
  
Bakura: (Glub) Help me!  
  
(Beatrix pulls a very cold Bakura out of the pool)  
  
Beatrix: Another person out past curfew.  
  
Bakura: S..s…so…c…co…col…cold.  
  
Beatrix: Get to your bunk. You too will have to serve duty after dark.  
  
Bakura: What does she mean by 'you too'?  
  
(Bakura goes back to his bunk)  
  
Day Two-5:00am  
  
(Beatrix enters the bunk and blows her whistle)  
  
Beatrix: WAKE UP!  
  
Thief: Uh….  
  
Ukira: Please make it stop…  
  
TSF: (Pulls a pillow over her head)  
  
(Aeris gets up)  
  
Aeris: C'mon guys!  
  
(Aeris is pelted with pillows)  
  
Aeris: Hey!  
  
Beatrix: WAKE UP! We have morning exercises to do!  
  
(Everyone gets up and heads outside)  
  
Beatrix: Okay, everyone pick up all the trash on campus.  
  
Thief: (Sweatdrop) How is that an exercise?  
  
Beatrix: By wearing these! (Lifts a two ton turtle shell)  
  
(Everyone puts theirs on, but Aeris can't move)  
  
TSF: This thing ways a ton!  
  
Thief: Actually it ways two-  
  
TSF: Shut up Thief.  
  
Ukira: How are we supposed to walk in these things?!  
  
Beatrix: GO! (Blows her whistle and everyone but Aeris starts picking up trash)  
  
TSF: Woo hoo! I got two pieces!  
  
Ukira: I've picked up seven.  
  
Thief: Well I've picked up ten so be quiet Ukira.  
  
Aeris: Someone help me!  
  
(Aeris is ignored)  
  
Aeris: Please?  
  
Thief: Twenty-seven!  
  
Ukira: Thirty-one!  
  
TSF: Eighteen!  
  
Aeris: GUYS!  
  
(Meanwhile with Bunk B)  
  
Vegeta: Wake up you fools! (Blows his whistle)  
  
Yugi: Huh?  
  
Sora: C'mon, I'm tired…  
  
Bakura: ZzZzZzZ…  
  
Kaiba: …  
  
Vegeta: WAKE UP NOW!  
  
(Bakura falls off his bed, Kaiba sits up, Yugi lifts up his head and hits the wall, and Sora starts grumbling)  
  
Yugi: Ouch…  
  
Kaiba: I was just about to get up; there was no need to yell.  
  
Bakura: I do say that was uncalled for.  
  
Sora: (Grumble)  
  
Vegeta: Every one outside!   
  
(Every one walks outside)  
  
(Yugi rubs his eyes)  
  
Yugi: Please don't make us do any more push-ups…  
  
Bakura: I'd prefer to go back to sleep.  
  
Vegeta: Well too bad! You four have to cook for the mess hall today.  
  
Kaiba: Cook? I'd rather do push-ups.  
  
Sora: Cooking?!  
  
Vegeta: Yes cooking!   
  
Yugi: That doesn't sound hard.  
  
Vegeta: Well get started! Breakfast is in an hour.  
  
(Kaiba, Yugi, Bakura, and Sora leave)  
  
(Meanwhile with Bunk A)  
  
Thief: I'm tired of picking up trash…  
  
Ukira: Really? I thought you were enjoying this.  
  
TSF: I am!   
  
(TSF picks up some more trash)  
  
Thief/Ukira: (Sweatdrop)  
  
TSF: What?  
  
Thief: Never mind…  
  
Aeris: Will someone help me already?!  
  
(Meanwhile with Chrysa)  
  
(Chrysa taps her bracelet)  
  
Yami Chrysa: How foolish they all are. Sooner or later I'll take all of their items and send them back to their own dimension. (Laughs maniacally)  
  
(That's kinda creepy…)  
  
Yami Chrysa: Shut up…  
  
(Meanwhile with Bunk B)  
  
(Yugi and company are in the mess hall standing in front of some stuff to cook with)  
  
(Thief: Wow, you're so descriptive)  
  
(Shut up, or I'll run you over with fan girls)  
  
(Thief: Jerk…)  
  
(Sora pokes a head of lettuce)  
  
Sora: What is this, a fruit?  
  
Bakura: Actually, that's a vegetable.  
  
Sora: Oh…what's a vegetable?  
  
Yugi: Maybe you should just sit over there…  
  
Kaiba: I'm not cooking…  
  
Yugi: Fine with me…  
  
Bakura: Well, what can you guys cook?  
  
Yugi: I can make toast…  
  
Sora: Cook?  
  
Bakura: (Sweatdrop) I think this is going to be harder than I thought.  
  
(Meanwhile with Bunk A)  
  
Thief: There, all the trash is gone.  
  
Ukira: Yeah, you keep thinking that.  
  
TSF: Why didn't I just zap it all away?  
  
Thief: …  
  
Ukira: …  
  
TSF: What?  
  
Ukira: Whatever…  
  
(Thief, Ukira, and TSF take off their shells)  
  
Thief: That's better.  
  
TSF: Much better.  
  
(The three of them head to the mess hall)  
  
Thief: Do you think we forgot something?  
  
Ukira: No, besides if we are it's probably not important.  
  
Thief: Yeah, okay.  
  
(Meanwhile with Bunk B)  
  
Bakura: Okay, Yugi you'll make toast. Sora, you'll make the eggs. I'll make pancakes and Kaiba will…  
  
Kaiba: I'll supervise.  
  
Bakura: Right.  
  
(Yugi walks over to the toaster)  
  
Yugi: Okay I have the bread and the butter all ready.  
  
(Five minutes later)  
  
(Yugi is shoving five pieces of bread in the toaster)  
  
Yugi: Okay Bakura, the toast is almost ready!  
  
(Sora walks over to the stove with some eggs)  
  
Sora: Okay, so how do I make these Bakura?  
  
Bakura: Just crack them and let them cook for a few minutes.  
  
Sora: That sounds easy.  
  
(Sora tosses the eggs on a pan and sets it on the stove)  
  
Sora: Okay, how long should I wait?  
  
Bakura: Five minutes I suppose…  
  
Sora: Alright then!  
  
(Bakura finishes stirring the pancake batter)  
  
Bakura: All I have to do now is put the batter on the pan and let it sit for a while.  
  
(Bakura pours the batter on a pan and waits a while before flipping)  
  
Kaiba: Is something burning?  
  
Bakura: Huh?  
  
(Yugi is shoving ten more slices of bread in the toaster and Sora's eggs are black as charcoal)  
  
Bakura: AH! What are you doing?!  
  
Yugi: Exactly what you said Bakura.  
  
(Ten minutes later the mess hall catches fire) 


	12. Kaiba's Duel

Thief-Chan: lol This should prove interesting...  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own...I capture!  
  
Thief: Hey! What happened to the mess hall?  
  
(The members of Bunk B walk out of, what's left of, the mess hall)  
  
Yugi: (Coughing) Uh, hello guys.  
  
Ukira: (Sweatdrop) Dare I ask what happened?  
  
Kaiba: These losers can't even make toast.  
  
TSF: TOAST?!  
  
Sora: Yugi made the toast, I made the eggs.  
  
Bakura: Well my food was cooking just fine, until you blew up the stove.  
  
Sora: (Sweatdrop) That was an accident.  
  
Kaiba: I'm going back to the bunk.   
  
(Kaiba leaves)  
  
TSF: I'm hungry.  
  
Ukira: Why are we standing by the mess hall still?  
  
(Ukira and TSF leave)  
  
Yugi: I think I'll go too.  
  
Sora: Yeah.  
  
Vegeta: Not so fast! Both of you will serve after dark as well.  
  
Yugi: Eh?  
  
Sora: Come again?  
  
Vegeta: You'll see.  
  
(Sora and Yugi leave)  
  
Thief: BAKURA! (Thief glomps Bakura)  
  
Bakura: (Sweatdrop) I got to go…  
  
(Bakura leaves)  
  
Thief: Well now what should I do?  
  
(Thief pulls her cards out of her pocket)  
  
Thief: Maybe I should duel someone…  
  
(Thief walks back to her bunk)  
  
Thief: Well, who here plays Duel Monsters?  
  
Kaiba: If you're looking for a duel, I'll give you one.  
  
(Thief turns around)  
  
Kaiba: But it ought to be a challenge for a chump like you.  
  
Thief: (Sweatdrop) WHAT WAS THAT?!  
  
(Fan girls glomp Kaiba)  
  
Fan Girl: KAIBA!  
  
Fan Girl2: KAIBA CAN WIN!  
  
Fan Girl3: WHEE!  
  
(Kaiba pushes all the fan girls away)  
  
Kaiba: Get off me you freaks.  
  
Yugi: Hey guys! Kaiba is going to duel Thief!  
  
Sora: This I got to see!  
  
Bakura: Oh no!  
  
(Bakura hides while Yugi and Sora run outside)  
  
TSF: Ukira! Kaiba and Thief are going to duel!  
  
(Ukira and TSF walk outside)  
  
Thief: I didn't agree to this…  
  
TSF: Too bad! It's Kaiba!  
  
(Thief: 8000 Kaiba: 8000)  
  
(Kaiba draws his card)  
  
Kaiba: I suppose it's a great honor to duel someone of my great caliber.  
  
Thief: (Sweatdrop)  
  
Fan Girl: (Has hearts in her eyes) KAIBA!  
  
Kaiba: …For my first brilliant move I lay one card face down and I summon the Blue Eyes White Dragon.  
  
Yugi: (Eyes grow huge) How'd he play that on his first move?  
  
Kaiba: Your move, fool.  
  
Thief: …I play this card face down in defense mode. And this card face down.  
  
(Thief: 8000 Kaiba: 8000)  
  
Kaiba: I play Judge Man in attack mode! Along with Malevolent Nuzzler, which increases his attack power by 700.  
  
(Judge Man: 2900)  
  
Kaiba: Now attack that face down card!  
  
(Labyrinth Wall turns face up)  
  
(Thief: 8000 Kaiba: 7900)  
  
BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!  
  
Thief: Sorry we're experiencing technical difficulties. We'll return to our duel as soon as Kaiba stops choking his fan girls.  
  
(Screen returns)  
  
Kaiba: (Mutters)  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: I play one card face down and end my turn.  
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: I place one card face down in defense mode. I also play this card face down. I also activate my magic card, Fissure!  
  
(Labyrinth wall is destroyed)  
  
Kaiba: Now my precious Blue Eyes, attack her life points directly!  
  
(Thief:5000 Kaiba: 7900)  
  
BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!  
  
Bakura: Sorry we're experiencing technical difficulties. GREAT SCOTT THIEF, PUT DOWN THAT HAMMER!  
  
(The screen returns)  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: (Mumbles) I play fissure! And I also place this card face down.  
  
Kaiba: NO! My Blue Eyes!  
  
(Blue Eyes is destroyed)  
  
BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!  
  
Thief: You know the drill…  
  
(Screen returns)  
  
Kaiba: I place this monster in defense mode. And I play horn of light as well. Are you not over shadowed by my brilliant moves! (Glares) You're next Yugi!  
  
Yugi: Meep!  
  
Thief: I play Monster Reborn! To reborn your Blue Eyes White Dragon!  
  
Kaiba: NOT MY BLUE EYES!  
  
Thief: I think I'll wait before attacking though…  
  
BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!  
  
Thief: Stupid piece of junk! (kicks the machine)  
  
(Screen returns)  
  
Kaiba: Jerk…  
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: Your move…  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: I play Red Medicine!   
  
(Thief: 5500 Kaiba: 7900)  
  
Thief: Blue eyes attack one of his defense monsters!  
  
(The monster dies and Kaiba summons one monster on the field, don't ask)  
  
Thief: Your turn…  
  
Kaiba: I play my Blue Eyes White Dragon in attack mode!  
  
Blue Eyes: Roar!  
  
Kaiba: I also play block attack! Shifting your stupid Blue Eyes in defense mode. Blue Eyes attack her Blue eyes!  
  
Blue Eyes: Roar!  
  
Other Blue Eyes: EEK!  
  
(Thief's Blue eyes dies)  
  
BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!  
  
Bakura: Glad I'm not watching right now…  
  
(Screen returns)  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: I play this card face down! I also play Yang in attack mode!  
  
Yang: Squeak!  
  
Kaiba: I play one card face down. And I attack you defense monster!  
  
(Elven Mage dies)  
  
Thief: (Sweatdrop) Whatever…I play the Black Sumoner Sphinx in attack mode! I also turn over my magic card, Heaven's Scroll, which boosts its attack points by 500!  
  
(Black Sumoner Sphinx Attack: 3100)  
  
Thief: Attack the Blue Eyes!  
  
Kaiba: I turn over Trap Hole!   
  
(Black Sumoner Sphinx dies)  
  
BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!  
  
Bakura: Uh oh…I don't like where this is going…  
  
(Screen returns)  
  
Kaiba: I place this card face down.  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: I place this card face down and end my turn.  
  
Kaiba: I place one card in defense mode and end my turn.  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: WHY ISN'T IT THE CARD I WANT?! I flip this card over, sending Yang back to your hand.  
  
Thief: …  
  
Kaiba: What?  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: I place one card face down in defense mode.  
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: (Mutters) I attack your defense monster!  
  
(Silver Phoenix is destroyed)  
  
Kaiba: Your Phoenix won't be coming back to life in this match!  
  
(Mokuba comes)  
  
Mokuba: SETO! (Glomps)  
  
Kaiba: …  
  
Thief: …  
  
Mokuba: Never mind…  
  
(Mokuba sits down and Thief draws)  
  
Thief: Er…I turn this card in defense mode. And this card in attack mode.   
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: …  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: (Good, he's shut up for once…)   
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: I play Okazi!  
  
(Thief: 4700 Kaiba: 7900)  
  
Kaiba: You're so lame you idiot! No wonder Bakura won't go out with you!  
  
BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!  
  
TSF: …  
  
(Screen returns)  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: …  
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: (Heart of the cards…)   
  
(Ukira snickers)  
  
Kaiba: I play this card in defense mode.  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: I play Giant Trunane, which sends all magic cards back to our hands.  
  
Thief: Fine with me…  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: I play this card face down.  
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: I place these two cards face down.  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: I place White Sumoner Sphinx in attack mode!   
  
(Bakura peeks out the Bunk window)  
  
Bakura: I hope she doesn't kill me…or worse not kill me!  
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: I play red medicine! Adding 500 life points to me, Kaiba!  
  
(Thief: 4700 Kaiba: 8400)  
  
Kaiba: I also flip over Big Eye!  
  
(Kaiba organizes his deck)  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: I place this card face down and end my turn.  
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: I play Monster Reborn! To reborn my Blue Eyes!  
  
Blue Eyes: Roar!  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: I place one card face down.  
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: I flip over my Big Eye…again.  
  
(Kaiba organizes his deck)  
  
Kaiba: And now my precious Blue Eyes, attack her defense monster!  
  
Thief: I activate Caged Wing!  
  
(Both Kaiba's Blue Eyes get trapped in a cage)  
  
Thief: Caged Wing traps all dragons on the field.  
  
Kaiba: Hmmph…You think your bird cage can trap my precious dragons!   
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: I flip over the magic card Summoner's Staff! Which summons all trapped monsters on the field back into my hand.  
  
(Thief 'snatches Kaiba's Blue Eyes)  
  
BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!  
  
Bakura: …Should I be cheering for Thief, or grieving?  
  
(Screen returns)  
  
Kaiba: (Growls)  
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: I play this card face down…that's all I do. I HATE YOU! CURSE YOU THIEF!  
  
Mokuba: …  
  
Thief: …uh, right.  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: I play this card face down. And I play one of my Blue Eyes on the field.  
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: I place one card face down…  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: Blue Eyes attack his Big Eye!  
  
(Big Eye is destroyed)  
  
Kaiba: (Growls again)   
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: I play Dark Hole!  
  
(All monsters die)  
  
Kaiba: I also use Monster Reborn!  
  
(Blue Eyes is reborn)  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: I play the Blue Eyes in attack mode!  
  
Blue Eyes: Roar…  
  
Thief: …  
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: I place this card face down along with one defense monster.  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: I play the Dark Magician in attack mode!  
  
Dark Magician: Um…roar?  
  
Thief: I also play this card face down.  
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: I play Fissure!  
  
(Dark Magician dies)  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: I play this card face down…  
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: I play De-spell!  
  
(Tears of Destiny is destroyed)  
  
Kaiba: I also play this card face down…And I play my Blue Eyes in attack mode! And with Reinforcements add 500 to his attack! ATTACK HER BLUE EYES!  
  
(Thief flips over Angel's Tears)  
  
Thief: I activate Angel's Tears! Which destroy your Blue Eyes!  
  
Blue Eyes: (dies)  
  
BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!  
  
Mokuba: Okay…  
  
(Screen returns)  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: I play my Blue Eyes White Dragon in attack mode! Blue Eyes attack…one of his defense monsters.  
  
(It dies)  
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: I place this card face down. And I activate Just Desserts!  
  
(Thief: 3700 Kaiba: 8400)  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: Blue Eyes attack his other monster!  
  
(It dies and Kaiba withdraws his Blue Eyes)  
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: I place this in defense mode…  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: That's all I'll do…  
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: I place this face down…  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: I play Ancient Wisdom, which destroys one of your trap cards!  
  
(It explodes)  
  
Kaiba: AH MY FRICKEN CARD! YOU IDIOT!  
  
Thief: (Sweatdrop)  
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: I play this card face down…  
  
(Thief draws)  
  
Thief: I play this card in defense mode…  
  
(Kaiba draws)  
  
Kaiba: I play Blue Eyes in attack mode!  
  
(Kaiba switches all his cards in attack mode)  
  
Kaiba: Blue Eyes attack her Blue Eyes!  
  
(They both die)  
  
Kaiba: Blue Eyes attack her other monster!  
  
(Kuribo dies)  
  
Kaiba: Attack her life points!  
  
(Thief: 300 Kaiba: 8400)  
  
Thief: (Smirks) Heehee…  
  
Kaiba: What's so funny?  
  
(Thief plays Exodia on the field)  
  
Kaiba: NO! IMPOSSIBLE! NO ONE HAS BEEN ABLE TO SUMMON HIM!  
  
Yugi: (Sweatdrop)  
  
Thief: Exodia, OBLITERATE!  
  
(Poof!)  
  
Kaiba: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 


	13. Dream sequences!

Thief-Chan: This chapter is wierd, that it is.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own. You should know that by know, that you should.  
  
Bakura: Ah, great.  
  
Thief: YAY! I win!  
  
Kaiba: I'll get my revenge Thief. Just you wait.  
  
(Kaiba leaves)  
  
Mokuba: Wait for me Seto!  
  
(Mokuba leaves)  
  
TSF: Great match Thief.  
  
Ukira: I thought she'd lose.  
  
Thief: …  
  
Yugi: Great match!  
  
(Yugi and Sora leave)  
  
TSF: So…what do you want to do now?  
  
Ukira: …  
  
Thief: I think I'll just go exploring.  
  
Ukira: Whatever…  
  
(Ukira leaves)  
  
Thief: What's with her?  
  
TSF: How am I supposed to know?  
  
Thief: …  
  
TSF: Well, I think I'll go now…  
  
(TSF leaves)  
  
Thief: Well, back to my exploring.  
  
(Thief leaves)  
  
(Meanwhile…)  
  
(Kaiba is on his bed staring at the ceiling)  
  
Kaiba: (Thief cheated. There's no other explanation! But how…?)  
  
(Mokuba pops out of nowhere)  
  
Mokuba: SETO!  
  
(Mokuba glomps Kaiba)  
  
(Kaiba scowls at Mokuba)  
  
Kaiba: What are you doing here?  
  
Mokuba: Want to go exploring?  
  
Kaiba: I'd rather not.  
  
Mokuba: Please?  
  
(Mokuba's eyes grow all big and chibi-ish)  
  
Kaiba: Fine, but only a small exploration.  
  
Mokuba: Yay!  
  
(Mokuba and Kaiba leave)  
  
(Bakura crawls out from under the bed)  
  
Bakura: Now what was that all about?  
  
(Bakura stands up and brushes dust off his vest thing. Sora and Yugi enter the bunk)  
  
Yugi: Hello Bakura!  
  
Sora: You missed a great duel! Kaiba got obliterated!  
  
Bakura: …  
  
Yugi: What's wrong? Thief won!  
  
Bakura: (Sweatdrop) (I'm in trouble…)  
  
(Meanwhile in Bunk Z)  
  
Yami Yugi: Why are we just sitting here?  
  
Yami Thief: Beats me. We could be doing something important and yet here we sit.  
  
(Yami Malik and Yami Bakura are fighting over who gets to sleep on the hammock)  
  
Yami Malik: You got the hammock yesterday!  
  
Yami Bakura: Yes but you kept me up all night!  
  
Yami Malik: How?  
  
Yami Bakura: You kept saying, 'The millennium items will all be mine' in your sleep!  
  
Yami Malik: Prove it!  
  
(Yami Malik and Yami Bakura fall on the floor arguing)  
  
Yami Yugi: (Sweatdrop)  
  
Yami Thief: Do they always argue?  
  
Yami Yugi: Yes.   
  
Yami Thief: I see…  
  
Yami Malik: Shut up pharaoh! You're just not arguing because you get to sleep on the couch!  
  
Yami Yugi: …  
  
(Yami Bakura jumps on the hammock)  
  
Yami Bakura: Mine!  
  
(Yami Malik tips the hammock over, causing Yami Bakura to fall off)  
  
Yami Malik: Your name isn't written on it!  
  
(Yami Bakura pulls out a pen and scribbles some hieroglyphics on the hammock)  
  
Yami Bakura: It is now!  
  
Yami Thief: *Sighs*  
  
(Meanwhile with Kaiba)  
  
Mokuba: Look Seto! Isn't that Joey?  
  
(Joey is talking to Tea)  
  
Joey: For the last time Tea; glue can't talk!  
  
Tea: Yes it can! (Pouts)  
  
(Joey turns around to see Kaiba and Mokuba. Joey smirks)  
  
Joey: Hey Kaiba, I heard Thief just royally whooped you!  
  
(Kaiba glares)  
  
Kaiba: That chump wouldn't have won if she didn't have Exodia. I could've have beaten her even without all three of my Blue Eyes.  
  
Mokuba: Yeah! Seto can beat anyone!  
  
Joey: (Grumbles) You can't beat Yugi without cheating, what makes you think you can beat Thief?  
  
Kaiba: I beat Yugi fair and square.   
  
Joey: Yeah, sure.   
  
Kaiba: Would you like to prove me otherwise, mutt?  
  
Joey: Grr…what'd you call me?!  
  
Tea: Don't fight! Be friends! FRIENDS!  
  
(Tea skips and throws confetti everywhere)  
  
Kaiba: Freaks…come on Mokuba.  
  
(Kaiba turns around and walks away)  
  
Mokuba: Wait for me!  
  
(Mokuba follows Kaiba)  
  
(Meanwhile with Thief)  
  
(Thief stares at the sky, bored)  
  
Thief: Man it's boring here…  
  
(E-gads! Not this again!)  
  
Thief: Not what again?  
  
(Whatever I say, you say)  
  
Thief: *Ish confused*  
  
(Never mind…)  
  
Thief: Whatever…  
  
(Thief turns around and sees Chrysa)  
  
Chrysa: Did you miss me?  
  
Thief: No.  
  
Chrysa: You're mean!  
  
Thief: So?  
  
Chrysa: Jerk.  
  
(Chrysa turns around, when Thief sees her bracelet)  
  
Thief: That's a strange looking bracelet…  
  
(Chrysa stares at her bracelet)  
  
Chrysa: Well, you are wearing odd earrings.  
  
Thief: …  
  
Chrysa: What?  
  
Thief: Is your bracelet…?  
  
Chrysa: Is it what?  
  
Thief: Never mind.  
  
(Thief leaves)  
  
(Later at around eight, everyone is asleep. Why? Just because)  
  
(Outside, Aeris is dreaming)  
  
(Cloud is seen running through a forest)  
  
Aeris: Cloud?  
  
Cloud: Hello, Aeris.  
  
Aeris: What are you doing here? I thought you weren't coming to camp.  
  
Cloud: I'm not.  
  
Aeris: Oh, so this is a dream.  
  
Cloud: I'm leaving.  
  
Aeris: Leaving? Leaving where?  
  
Cloud: IF YOU LISTEN, MAYBE I"LL TELL YOU!  
  
Aeris: Oh.  
  
Cloud: I'm leaving.  
  
Aeris: When will you come back?  
  
Cloud: NEVER! …I mean, I'll come back when it's all over.  
  
Aeris: When what's over?  
  
(Aeris wakes up)  
  
Aeris: That was odd…  
  
(Aeris tries to sit up, but she is still wearing her turtle shell)  
  
Aeris: What the…?  
  
(Meanwhile in Bunk A, Ukira is dreaming)  
  
(Ukira opens her eyes to see she is sitting in a tree)  
  
Ukira: What the…? How did I end up here?  
  
(Kaiba passes by the tree)  
  
Ukira: Kaiba?  
  
Kaiba: I'm not Kaiba!  
  
(Kaiba shifts and forms into Trunks)  
  
Trunks: I'm Trunks!  
  
Ukira: …  
  
Trunks: What? It's just a dream!  
  
Ukira: Oh. So that means none of this is real.  
  
Trunks: Yup!  
  
Ukira: Okay then.  
  
(Ukira jumps down from the tree)  
  
Trunks: So what are you going to do?  
  
Ukira: Uh…  
  
(Ukira wakes up)  
  
Ukira: What kind of crappy dream was that?!  
  
(A very crappy one)  
  
Ukira: No duh!  
  
(Shut up!)  
  
(TSF is dreaming…)  
  
TSF: Yugi!  
  
(Yugi is standing in front of TSF)  
  
TSF: Duel me!  
  
Yugi: Okay!  
  
(Yugi changed so that he is wearing the Dark Magician's clothes. TSF changes so she is wearing The Mystical Elf's)  
  
Yugi: Dark Magic Attack!  
  
(Yugi raises his staff and flowers pop out)  
  
Yugi: What the…?  
  
TSF: Uh…  
  
(TSF throws a show at Yugi)  
  
TSF: SHOE!  
  
(Whatever)  
  
Yugi: Ow! What was that for?  
  
TSF: I don't know.  
  
Yugi: Why are we dueling? You don't even have any Duel Monster cards.  
  
TSF: Because….I don't know.  
  
(TSF wakes up)  
  
TSF: Well that was lame!  
  
(Thief is dreaming…)  
  
Thief: Where am I?  
  
Bakura: You've just arrived home, don't you remember?  
  
Thief: No.  
  
Bakura: Beatrix has let us go home early.  
  
Thief: Really?  
  
Bakura: Yes.  
  
Thief: Yay!   
  
(Thief glomps Bakura)  
  
Bakura: …  
  
Thief: Where's Macavity?  
  
(Macavity comes in the room with a tray of cookies)  
  
Macavity: Would you like something to eat?  
  
(Thief eats a few cookies)  
  
Thief: Where's Yugi?  
  
Bakura: Yugi went to buy you some more cards.  
  
Thief: Yay!  
  
(Thief glomps Bakura)  
  
Thief: What are you doing here anyway?  
  
Bakura: The author of this story thinks I should be tortured.  
  
Thief: Oh.  
  
(Thief wakes up)  
  
Thief: Huh?  
  
Beatrix: Thief, it's time to pay the price for staying up past curfew!  
  
Thief: Oh great…  
  
(Thief leaves the bunk)  
  
Beatrix: Aeris will be joining you, since she was outside when I found her.  
  
Thief: I knew we forgot something!  
  
(Meanwhile in Bunk B)  
  
(Kaiba is dreaming…)  
  
(Yugi and Thief are wearing shackles as they bow before Kaiba)  
  
Yugi/Thief: (In a monotone voice) All hail Kaiba….  
  
(Kaiba lashes them with a whip)  
  
Kaiba: That's master Kaiba!  
  
Yugi/Thief: All hail master Kaiba…  
  
Kaiba: Hahaha! Not so high and mighty now are you?  
  
(Kaiba wakes up)  
  
Kaiba: …  
  
(Kaiba goes back to sleep)  
  
(Yugi is sleeping…)  
  
Yugi: …  
  
(Yugi wakes up)  
  
Yugi: What the?  
  
(Bakura is sleeping…)  
  
Bakura: What the…?  
  
(Bakura is falling)  
  
Bakura: Ahhh! I'm falling!  
  
(Thief falls past Bakura)  
  
Thief: Hello!  
  
Bakura: Why are we falling?  
  
Thief: We're falling down a bottomless pit!  
  
Bakura: A bottomless pit…but that means we'll-  
  
Thief: Fall forever! Until death do we part!  
  
Bakura: AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
(Bakura wakes up)  
  
Bakura: …  
  
(Sora is dreaming)  
  
Sora: Where am I?  
  
(Sora is in darkness)  
  
Sora: This is weird…  
  
(Sora sees Riku)  
  
Sora: Riku? Is it really you?  
  
Riku: Sora, you're falling into the mind of a heartless!  
  
Sora: I'm what?!  
  
Riku: Give me your hand!  
  
(Riku reaches out his hand to Sora. Sora can't reach it, so he falls back)  
  
Riku: Soraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!  
  
(Sora wakes up)  
  
Sora: ???  
  
(Vegeta blows his whistle waking everyone up again) 


	14. Lame plot twists

Thief-Chan: Much shorter after the last chapter, but at least I'm back!  
  
Disclaimer: I really don't like disclaimers...  
  
Vegeta: Bakura and Yugi, out!  
  
Yugi: What did I do?  
  
Vegeta: Nothing! I just don't like you!  
  
(Yugi and Bakura walk outside. Vegeta leads them to a dead orchard)  
  
Beatrix: Good, they're all here.  
  
Thief: All?  
  
(Thief turns around to see Bakura and Yugi)  
  
Thief: Yay!  
  
Beatrix: Shut up! The four of you have to chop down all of these trees! Vegeta and me will be back here in an hour. You should be done by then.  
  
Thief: An hour?!  
  
Beatrix: Fine, half an hour!  
  
(Beatrix and Vegeta leave)  
  
Bakura: …  
  
Yugi: How are we supposed to chop down these trees?  
  
Aeris: With an ax, duh.  
  
Bakura: I don't see any axes around here.  
  
Thief: Then just use your arm!  
  
(Thief powers up and starts hacking at the tree with her arm)  
  
Everyone except Thief: (Sweatdrop)  
  
Thief: What?  
  
Yugi: Never mind…  
  
(Chrysa jumps out of one of the trees)  
  
Chrysa: Hello!  
  
Bakura: ?  
  
Yugi: Who are you?  
  
Chrysa: My name is Chrysa!  
  
Aeris: …  
  
Thief: Will some one help me all ready!  
  
(Chrysa lifts her hand in the air and sets the tree on fire)  
  
Thief: Thanks.  
  
Bakura: …  
  
Yugi: …  
  
Aeris: Eek!  
  
(Aeris flees and drops ten gil)  
  
Chrysa: What?  
  
Thief: I guess they aren't used to magic-users.  
  
Chrysa: Well they better get used to it!  
  
Thief: Why?  
  
Chrysa: You'll see!  
  
(Chrysa and all the trees disappear)  
  
Bakura: That was odd…  
  
Yugi: Yeah…  
  
Thief: Let's go.  
  
(The three of them leave)  
  
(Half and hour later, Vegeta and Beatrix return to the orchard)  
  
Beatrix: …?  
  
Vegeta: I'll just make a better plan.  
  
(Vegeta laughs menacingly)  
  
Beatrix: Whatever…  
  
(The next morning, everyone goes to the newly built mess hall)  
  
Thief: What is this stuff?  
  
(Thief dips her spork in a soup-like food)  
  
Ukira: Looks like lumpy soup to me.  
  
TSF: It smells like shoes.  
  
Thief: Everything smells like shoes to you.  
  
TSF: That isn't true!  
  
Ukira: Then what doesn't smell like shoes to you?  
  
TSF: Shoes.  
  
Intermission:  
  
(Thief, Ukira, TSF, and Chrysa stare at the screen)  
  
Thief: Hello, I'm Thief.  
  
Ukira: I'm Ukira.  
  
TSF: I'm The Shoe Fairy.  
  
Chrysa: I'm Chrysa.  
  
Thief: Today we have a 'Special Guest Intermission'! And today's special guest is Gohan!  
  
Gohan: (Get me out of here…)  
  
(TSF pokes Gohan's thought bubble)  
  
Gohan: Hey!  
  
TSF: Sorry.  
  
Thief: Before we talk about Gohan, is there anything about the story that needs to be cleared up?  
  
(Silence)  
  
Macavity: Um…  
  
Ukira: How come I have so few parts?  
  
Chrysa: Yeah! I want more parts too!  
  
Thief: Shut up! You two aren't that important to the plot!  
  
(Points at title)  
  
Thief: It is called 'Adventures of Thief'!  
  
Ukira: So?  
  
Chrysa: That doesn't mean you should get all the parts!  
  
TSF: Half the time she's just acting stupid, so don't complain!  
  
Gohan: Can I go?  
  
Thief: No.   
  
Chrysa: Yeah, we have to interrogate you.  
  
Gohan: About what?  
  
Thief: Stuff.  
  
(TSF pulls out a huge magnifying glass)  
  
TSF: Where were you on May 29, 2002?  
  
Gohan: Training?  
  
TSF: That is incorrect! But you still may have second prize.  
  
Gohan: Uh, what's second prize?  
  
TSF: You can choose between a lifetime supply of cheese, and this pack of gummy worms.  
  
Gohan: Hmmm…I'll take the gummy worms.  
  
(Ukira pours the gummy worms on Gohan's head)  
  
Thief: …  
  
Ukira: What?  
  
Thief: Never mind, this story is pointless anyway…  
  
Bakura: Will someone please untie me?!  
  
All except Gohan and Yugi: NO!  
  
Thief: Well that's all for now! By-  
  
End of Intermission...  
  
(Thief, TSF, and Ukira leave the mess hall clenching their stomachs)  
  
TSF: That food was awful!  
  
Thief: No kidding….  
  
Ukira: I think I'm going to be sick…  
  
(The three of them collapse on the floor)  
  
(Meanwhile…)  
  
(Bakura, Yugi, and Sora run out of the mess hall clenching their stomachs)  
  
Bakura: I do say, that food was terrible!  
  
Yugi: My mouth is numb!  
  
Sora: Uhg…  
  
(The three of them collapse on the floor)  
  
(Meanwhile with Chrysa)  
  
Chrysa: Perfect! They're all knocked out cold! Time to search their rooms… 


End file.
